I gotcha

Lately when I put Elijah to bed at night, he has been especially clingy and huggy. For the first time ever, he doesn't want me to leave him. He has never had any trouble parting with us at bedtime, so it has been really hard for me to deny my snuggly 3-year-old of bedtime cuddles. Each night as I sit in his chair with him, I think, Someday I will be ACHING for this again. So I usually let some time pass before I put an end to the snuggling and put him into his bed.

He wraps his arms around my neck after we say prayers and he burrows his little body into mine and says, "HUG! HUG! HUG!" until I am squeezing him just firmly enough. When he says, "HUG!" I usually say back to him, "I gotcha, my man." Ever since he was a tiny baby in the NICU, this is something Dan and I have always said to him. I remember whispering "Mama's gotcha!" into his ear when he was a day old and when things were so new and scary. It was my way of telling him that we would never let go of him. We would never stop loving him and we would always be there for him.

So after I say that to him at bedtime, he has started to say back to me, "I gotcha, Mom!" Through tears, I say, "Thank you, Elijah, I'm so glad you've got me, too."