Wednesday = our Monday

I looooove snuggling with my littlest man (with my biggest man, too, but he denies me most of the time these days).



Well, we had a half rough day and half great day. Samson defied sleep for the first part of the day and was therefore pretty crabby. We met some friends for lunch and they got to listen to him scream his lungs out for a good portion of it. The rest of the day he slept and he even had some quiet alert time when he wasn't eating, sleeping or crying. This was huge!!

Sam likes to sleep with his hands over his face..



I have found that I've been way more impatient with this post-pregnancy weight loss than I was with my last one. I keep looking at the scale and saying, WHAT????? I tried on some pre-pregnancy pants today and they came up to my mid-thigh. !!! Ok, I know it has only been a month, but I can be pretty hard on myself in this area. I don't remember being so hard on myself last time. Maybe that is because I was preoccupied with heart surgeries, etc.



Dan is home early (YAY!) so I'm going to get Elijah to bed and take a bath. That is one of the luxuries my husband allows me when he is home.

Thanks for checking in on our crazy family!

Fusssssss

I just got done scheduling Elijah's summer appointments. He has follow-ups with urology, neurosurgery, genetics, a teeth cleaning and possibly an ENT appointment that we have been avoiding. Fun!



Yesterday was a little rough on the Sam front. FUSSY FUSSY FUSSY!! We have known he has some gas issues and that could be the reason for all of the sudden screaming but we really aren't sure what is going on with our little guy. He constantly acts hungry and if he isn't eating or sleeping he can usually be found screaming his head off. Thank goodness Dan was around to help yesterday. I'm not sure how I would have handled it alone. Today has been a little bit better so far.

We moved Sam to his crib last night! It was the first night we didn't have him in bed with us and although it was a little sad for me, it went really well. He still wakes up every three hours to eat, but sleeps great (usually) when he isn't eating.

We are going to attempt a trip out of the house today. Elijah is still sleeping in a crib, so we are going to check out some big boy beds for him. Thanks for checking in!

Chillin at home today

This is my first day at home totally alone with the boys and it is indeed challenging to keep things (and a certain 3-year-old) in line. Patience patience patience!



I'm struggling with being the mean mommy who is always saying SSSHHHHHH! and giving time-outs and just generally being crabby. Hopefully I won't always have to be (or at least feel like) the meanie mommy.



We did make it to the park this morning, thanks to my magic sling! Right now Samson is sleeping and Elijah is eating lunch and things are relatively peaceful. I better go grab some lunch while I have the chance!

Our Saturday

A lot of people have been commenting on Elijah's hair lately. Maybe it's time for a haircut.



My boys and I had a good day. I don't know if it is coincidence or if I found the magic ingredient for a happy Sam, but my baby sling worked wonders today. I put Samson in it for our very stressful part of the day (after 4:00) and he slept peacefully! That allowed me to: feed Elijah dinner (without pulling my hair out), eat dinner myself (this is huge), clean the kitchen, play with Elijah, get the mail and get on the computer. WOW!

This morning we went to the Farmer's Market in Minneapolis with Dan's mom. We got some yummy fresh veggies and the boys were both really well-behaved. I'm not sure what is on our agenda for tomorrow. With this magic sling, I feel like we can do anything!

I just overheard Elijah telling our exercise ball that had rolled over and bumped into his back, "Not nice! I typing computer! No no ball! You naughty!" :)

That's all for now! Have a great weekend..

Thank you, Samson, for letting me write a quick post!

Every time I sit down to write a post, Sam lets me know that he dictates what goes on in this house! This week has brought more fussiness from our little man. During the day, he does not like to be anywhere but in my arms. If he were our only child and I never had anything to do, that would work out great! We are lucky, though, that he sleeps really well at night. He is still eating every three hours around the clock, but his feedings are a piece of cake.

This week has also brought on a bit of the baby blues for me. I think the nursing fiasco set it in motion and then seeing a huge decrease in the time I'm able to spend with Elijah has made it worse. I got news this week that I have to go back to work sooner than I was planning and that has caused a good deal of tears, as well.

Overall, life is really good and I have nothing to complain about. My boys are wonderful and happy and healthy and I am reminded every single day what an amazing husband I have.

Today is Friday and that means we won't be seeing Dan for a few days. Who ever thought I would be looking forward to Mondays?? We miss him so much when he is working! Thanks for checking in on us. I will try to get another update up this weekend. If Sam allows! :)

Oh, here's a quick Elijah funny. He loves playing with our coasters that we have on the table in our living room. He calls them his "roller coasters." Silly boy.

My Elijah

One thing I did not expect was to love this little boy even more than I did before Samson was born. Somehow, having a baby has made my love for Elijah grow. Maybe it's because I see him making sacrifices and giving up time with us that he had before. All I know is that I can't get enough of him and he seems like such a BIG boy to me now. I am the world's luckiest mama!

Survived the weekend!

Well, I survived the weekend without Dan, thanks to our awesome family and friends. Thank you to all of you who helped out. I appreciate the help and food and love more than you will ever know. Dan has Mondays and Tuesdays off, so I am happy happy happy to have him at home with us today.



Starting today we are putting Sammy on a diet of sorts. His constant pigging out is starting to take its toll on all of us. So now we are feeding him every three hours during the day, no more and no less than that. Hopefully this will get us on a semi-schedule eventually.



I made the decision to stop nursing AND pumping altogether. It was a really tough and tearful decision, but it has already made me a happier mama. The stress that went along with trying sooo hard and being in so much constant pain was not worth it for me. I have more important things to focus my energy on right now. So now Sam is officially a formula-fed baby! And I am slowly making peace with my decision.



Elijah is doing well. He got to spend a lot of time with cousins and other family members and friends this weekend and he absolutely loved that! This kid loves people so much. Every time our doorbell rings, he gets crazy and giddy.

Thanks for checking in! Time to go snuggle with my littlest man for a bit while Dan and Elijah are at the park.

Dan says funny things when he is tired

We have a middle-of-the-night routine where I get up and pump while Dan gets Sam's bottle ready and feeds him. Last night I heard the slurp slurp slurping that Sam does when he is hungry, so I nudged Dan..

Me: Do you want to go get a bottle ready?

Dan: For who?

Me: Seriously? Who do you think?

[pause]

Dan: For the little guy?

Me: Who else would you be getting a bottle for?

Dan: I don't know.

Answered prayers

A little brotherly love..



Last night was probably our most difficult night so far. Sam has become a grazer, so some of his feedings get really drawn out and slow (you know he got this from YOU, Gramps!). We were up with him a few times last night for long stretches, so we are a tired bunch today.



I have been worrying about and dreading this weekend like crazy. I have no idea how everything is going to get done with only me here with the two little ones. I checked my email this morning and a very sweet friend has offered to come over on Saturday and bring dinner and also spend some time with Elijah so I can get some time with Samson, etc. I couldn't have gotten a more perfect offer, so I am feeling better about everything. Thank you, Debra!! We can't wait to see you!

Then I got a call from my very sweet lactation consultant. She was checking in to see how things were going. I was honest with her. I told her I just wasn't sure I was going to be able to pump, attempt nursing AND be a good mom to both of my boys AND take showers regularly. She was so incredibly supportive of whatever decision I make and that really meant a lot to me. I have some big decisions to make in the near future and the thing I worry about most is finding peace with those decisions. Mama Guilt is a strong strong emotion!! I don't want to be held captive by it, and that is my main prayer these days.

Elijah just got home from playing with his friends, so I must go love on him!!

Slurp slurp

Isn't this the sweetest little thing you have ever seen?



And here is the crazy big brother (please excuse the exposed diaper).



Some quick funny things said/going on in our house:

This is how Elijah says "Samson": Sam. Son. Two very separate words.

Elijah is in a "Who's this?" phase where he points to everything and everyone and wants to know "who" it is.

Sam doesn't cry for food in the middle of the night. Instead, we can hear him sucking like crazy on his hands. Slurrrp slurrrp....hmmm, I think Samson is hungry!


Samson continues to eat like an endless pit. He is such a mellow and enjoyable baby (when he's not saying "WHERE IS MY FOOD?"). We all love him so much! Elijah is doing really well with having a new person in the house. We still are seeing no signs of jealousy. I have been making a point to take him on Mommy-Elijah outings to the park or to Dairy Queen so we can have that one-on-one time together. I want him to know he is still my special little man.

(Gauging from the rude voicemail message left on my phone today, the warning on my last post wasn't heeded, so saying "read with caution" probably isn't necessary.) I went to see my lactation consultant today and we tried to get Sam to nurse. I am still not healed enough for that to happen. :( She called him a "hoover" because if he doesn't get his food NOW, he gets frustrated and just starts sucking and chomping like a crazy man. She showed me how to "finger feed" him until I am healed enough to try nursing again, but I just don't know if it is worth all of the extra time and effort. I am already pumping a million times a day, so I don't feel like adding extra tasks is a great idea right now. I am considering not nursing Sam at all and just pumping for him for a few months to get him what he needs for a while. Please pray for me to find peace in whatever decision I make. And THANK YOU to all of you supportive people who have provided me with valuable information about breastfeeding, etc. I appreciate all of your words of support and advice more than you know!

If you have room on your prayer list, you could say a little prayer for us this weekend. Dan goes back to work starting on Friday and I'm a little nervous about how I will handle it all without him. If it weren't for the darn pumping, it would be a piece of cake. Pumping on such a strict schedule makes things a lot more challenging. I will get a chance to work on my multitasking!

Thanks for checking in on us!!

Milk milk milk

I love Sam's male pattern baldness. :)



If you are one of those people who think what I write gets too personal or that I give too much information, STOP READING NOW. Hopefully by saying that I can save myself a few complaints.

Thank you to all of you who have given lactation advice. Here's my scoop. Sam wasn't latching right and because of that, caused some serious damage. I was raw and bleeding and in tremendous pain. I saw a lactation consultant and she said I was so damaged that she wouldn't even help me with Samson's latch. She wanted me to heal first. So I have been solely pumping, every 2-3 hours to try to sustain my milk supply. The thing that makes me so sad is that when I was REALLY damaged (things are finally starting to heal now), I went long stretches without pumping or feeding because it was way too painful. Ever since then, my supply has gone way down and I'm having a hard time getting it back up. I cannot keep up with what Sam needs right now. :(

I'm taking Fenugreek capsules and drinking Mother's Milk tea three times a day, in addition to pumping every 2-3 hours. I'm doing everything my lactation consultant has suggested and I'm still not seeing good results. Right now we are having to give Samson formula a couple times a day and I hate that. If anyone has additional suggestions for me, I would be happy to hear them!

Once I am totally healed, I will head back to my lactation consultant to get help with Sam's latch but in the meantime I need to make sure I'm producing enough to make it worth it. This has been the most difficult thing I've dealt with since Samson was born. If it weren't for this, I seriously would have no complaints. I love this little boy and am enjoying him so much. I am trying to absorb everything about Samson when he is still so little because pretty soon he will be jabbering and running around like his crazy brother.

Thanks for the lactation encouragement, everyone!

Ouchies

Sam likes to cross his feet just like his big brother Elijah does.



If it weren't for my many bodily discomforts, this week would have been a complete breeze. I'm having some problems with feeding Sam, so the possibility of not being able to nurse him is looming and just thinking about that makes me very very sad. In fact, I cannot talk about it without crying. I keep praying that things will work out, but I don't see how it will be possible.



Our little Samson had his first post-birth doctor's visit yesterday. He weighed 6 lbs, 13 oz, which is almost his birth weight. It usually takes babies two weeks to get back to their birth weights, so this is awesome! It was weird/surreal to be at the doctor and not have to discuss serious topics. As I have said before, this experience is so completely different from our last experience. It makes me want to have three more! Kidding.

Sammy is needing some mama love, so I better go munch him up..

Six days old

Minus some serious destruction of certain body parts of mine related to feeding Sam, things are really going great. Samson is an amazingly good baby. He is a great sleeper and a great eater and just a mellow, happy fellow. We are so blessed to have him as a part of our family!



I have to admit that before Samson was born I did a lot of wondering about how I could possibly love another child as much as I love Elijah. I bonded with Elijah when he was still in my belly and ever since, I have just loved that kid with my whole heart. When I didn't bond with Sam during pregnancy, I worried about that. But, there was nothing to worry about because once I met him in person I fell totally in love! It seems so impossible that love can grow with each child, but it is miraculously true. I am completely in love with both of my little boys!! I feel so thankful for them.

That's all for now! Thank you for checking in on us.

Four days old!

Things honestly could not be going more smoothly for us. Last night Samson was an AWESOME sleeper. Dan and I put him in our bed with us and we had to wake him up both times to eat in the middle of the night. We woke up feeling quite rested this morning!



Elijah has been very sweet to Sam, always wanting to hold "it." :) He hasn't shown any signs of jealousy yet, but from what I hear, that will come.



I feel like Samson is the perfect little addition to our family. I worried so much about how we would all adjust and so far it is going better than I ever could have dreamed. I'm so in love with him already.



So far, here is what we know about Samson. He does not like having his diaper changed (AT ALL). He loves to sleep. He has the softest skin on the planet (I've been nibbling on his neck as much as he will let me). He LOVES TO EAT. With Elijah, we were always super concerned about him not eating enough. With Sam, we are concerned about not having enough food available for him.



I have to mention what an amazing husband I have. I have not changed ONE diaper of Sam's yet. Dan is so good about making sure I am comfortable (c-section pain still owie) and that I can focus on my main baby duty (feeding Sam). I feel so lucky with the three boys God has given to me. I could not be a luckier wife/mama.

(This is Sam's trademark one-eyed peek. He likes to open his right eye and check out what is going on around him.)



Elijah is napping, so I am going to grab my littlest cutie and head upstairs for a nap, too. Thanks for checking in and for all of the prayers and well wishes. We love our friends and family!!

Home!

Well, we are home! I feel like we don't have our crap together at all, but that is expected for a while, I think. Feeding Sam is extremely painful and quite the task, but we are working hard on it.

Samson is a hungry boy, and he especially likes to eat (pretty much constantly) between the hours of 9:00 p.m. and 7:00 a.m. His favorite activity to do during the daytime hours is sleep. Hopefully we can get that switched around soon.

Last night Dan and I got about an hour of sleep between the two of us. Between Sam's constant feedings and Elijah's croup episode that Dan had to rush to his parents' house to help out with, we were a busy little family in the middle of the night. Yes, Elijah got croup while at Grandma's house and it was scary for all of us. It all turned out ok, though.

We have some more cute photos to share, but getting them on here would require a bit of time, which I don't have today. Maybe tomorrow. Thanks for all of the well wishes and prayers you all have sent our way in the past few days!

p.s. Sorry about the bloody Samson pic that Dan posted a few days ago. Apparently some people were pretty grossed out by it so we took it down. Sorry!

Welcome to the world, sweet boy!

Everyone, meet Samson Porta! We finally found a first name that we both love. This little guy definitely looks like a Samson to us. We aren't sure if we will call him Sam or Samson or Sammy, but we love all three options. (We haven't picked a middle name yet.)



Dan and I are enjoying spending time with and getting to know our second son. He sure does look a lot like his big brother. He has the cutest little high-pitched squeal that he makes when he is unhappy or hungry. Yesterday and today he has gone between periods of wanting to eat constantly and wanting to sleep constantly. Unfortunately we haven't been able to time things right, so Dan and I haven't gotten to sleep much when he does.



I'm a lot more sore today than I was yesterday from the c-section, but I am able to get up and move around a tiny bit. All of my IVs/tubes are gone, and I've even been able to wear my own comfy clothes all day instead of those horrible gowns. We are thinking if everything continues to go smoothly that we will get sent home Monday morning.



Elijah (along with Grandma and Grandpa) stopped by to meet his little brother last night and he was extremely gentle and sweet with him. I don't think he fully understands that this little guy will be coming home with us for good, but soon that will become a reality. I miss Elijah terribly, but I'm trying to keep in mind that very soon we will all be home together as a family of four.



This has all been such a completely different and new experience for us. We feel like brand new parents in almost every way. When Dan first carried Sam over to me in recovery, the first thing I thought was, "Where is his IV pole and where are all of his wires?" Even today, every time I pick him up I start to search for his wires so I can gather them, too. Except, there are none! It's totally crazy!



I think the little man is starting to wake up from his five-hour nap, so I should go see if he is hungry. Thank you for all of the prayers! We are extremely thankful for our wonderful and supportive friends and family.

Baby Boy is Here!

The latest edition to our little family arrived at 7:15 this morning after a very smooth c-section. He (we still aren't quite sure on the name...Zooter just might have to do) is 7 lbs, 20 in long and totally healthy. Megan did awesome and is currently resting with the baby right now.
I'm very blessed to have such a wonderful, strong wife!

Here are a couple pictures of the New Guy:

Catching up

I have a backlog of photos I want to post before we head to the hospital tomorrow.

I love this one..



Have I mentioned that Elijah loves playing with his ears?



Elijah adores his "Auntie Wynn."



Drinking some milk with "tickle glubs" on.



Hmmmmmm..



He likes to hide under this blanket on our bed like a silly boy.



Getting guitar lessons from Ben. :)



We are preparing for our big day tomorrow! It is a little strange to think that we are going to come back to this house after the weekend as a family of FOUR.

I will have Dan write an update as soon as it is convenient tomorrow, once the baby is born. We would appreciate any prayers you are willing to send our way for a smooth c-section and for good health for the baby! Thank you!!

38 weeks, 5 days (!!!)

I figured I would wrap up the lounging pics..



Not much changed since last week's visit with the doctor, so we are set for a 7:00 a.m. c-section on Friday. I have prayed so hard for a 39-week delivery and now that it looks like it is going to happen I can hardly believe it!

I am feeling crabby today, mostly because I'm extremely physically uncomfortable. I am sore and achy in the strangest places. Every time I stand up, I think, "Hmmm, that is an odd place to be sore.." I am pretty excited to have a non-pregnant body again.

Our house is clean, laundry is done and bags are packed. We are ready to go! We have some scheduling things to figure out for Elijah (kind of hard to expect other people to watch your child starting at 4:30 on a Friday morning), but we will get it all figured out.

It is so hard to believe that my contractions never got out of control (more than 5-6/hour) with this pregnancy. I would have bet so much money on not being pregnant for this long. I am very thankful for it, though!


I almost forgot!! Here are a few funny Elijah translations:
coupon = "poo-con"
polka dots = "poke-uh-nots"
drifting = "dripping"
banana = "ba-man-ah"

38 weeks, 4 days (!!)

Yes, I'm still pregnant. I can't stop eating oatmeal raisin cookies and Ben & Jerry's Half Baked ice cream, so I am feeling huger and more uncomfortable by the minute. It is looking like Friday might just be our newest little boy's birthday! We have to be at the hospital by 5:00 a.m. for a 7:00 c-section (unless labor starts sometime before then, of course). I have an appointment tomorrow, so I'll share whatever insight she might have after we get home.

Gotta go find some more cookies..