Saturday, February 23, 2008
Birthday party!
We had our awesome family and friends over for Elijah's birthday party today. We were so happy to see cousins and grandmas and grandpas and aunties. Elijah was an unhappy boy, though. He hasn't been himself today. He wasn't his usual smiley self during the party and has needed LOTS of sleep today. To be honest, I'm worried. I think something is going on. His O2 sats are low and he's drinking (a lot) less and he's much less interactive than he normally is and his personality is different, so I'm worried. I'm going to call Dr. G on Monday morning and see what he thinks. We were happy to have our fabulous family over, though. Thank you for driving to our house! We love you all!!!!
Thursday, February 21, 2008
One-year well visit
We took Elijah to his one-year well visit with Dr. Judy today. It went great! Well, aside from the fact that his oxygen sats are even lower than they were last week (they ran between 72-75% today). That's to be expected, though, because he is growing very fast. My mommy intuition tells me that surgery is NEAR. The G-man told us we would schedule surgery when he dips below the 70% mark and he is almost there!
The aching pain in my arm and back is confirmation that we have a chunky monkey. Today Elijah weighed 22 lb. 10 oz. and was 29.5 inches long. He's in the 50th percentile for both! His head circumference is in the 70th percentile! He's awesome!
We are finally able to get rid of one of his nebulizer medications. Now he will only be inhaling Pulmicort twice a day to prevent lung distress. This is wonderful news. And he gets to start drinking yummy cow's milk (thank goodness, SO MUCH CHEAPER) instead of formula.
Dr. Judy told us not to worry AT ALL about his delayed gross motor development. He is making progress and that is all that matters. Who knows how much work it might be for Elijah to get places on his own. We just don't know how hard his little body is working and how yucky it might make him feel to move around a whole bunch (although from his great disposition, you'd never know he felt yucky). His fine motor skills and speech are right on par, so he is doing very well, considering everything he has been through. Oh and his molars are about to break through the gums!
We met some good friends of ours that we haven't seen in a long time at the Bonfire. It was so good to see them! As always, Elijah was a little ham and was incredibly good. What other baby would sit happily in his high chair for two hours, not fussing once, just eating Cheerios and smiling at everyone who walked by? At the end of dinner they brought out a cake for him. He dug his hands in it and licked the frosting in delight. It was really cute. We got some pics of the lunar eclipse! It's so cool that that happened on Elijah's first birthday. Saturday is the big birthday party! Elijah can't wait for more cake!
He likes you, Neal! You're a natural. I wish we could have seen your sweet baby girl last night, too. We miss you!
AAaaww, so cute.
Jon and Anna, the cutest skydiving couple we know. We miss you guys, too!
Anna is sooo pretty!
Fire!
Mmmmmm, frosting so good
The aching pain in my arm and back is confirmation that we have a chunky monkey. Today Elijah weighed 22 lb. 10 oz. and was 29.5 inches long. He's in the 50th percentile for both! His head circumference is in the 70th percentile! He's awesome!
We are finally able to get rid of one of his nebulizer medications. Now he will only be inhaling Pulmicort twice a day to prevent lung distress. This is wonderful news. And he gets to start drinking yummy cow's milk (thank goodness, SO MUCH CHEAPER) instead of formula.
Dr. Judy told us not to worry AT ALL about his delayed gross motor development. He is making progress and that is all that matters. Who knows how much work it might be for Elijah to get places on his own. We just don't know how hard his little body is working and how yucky it might make him feel to move around a whole bunch (although from his great disposition, you'd never know he felt yucky). His fine motor skills and speech are right on par, so he is doing very well, considering everything he has been through. Oh and his molars are about to break through the gums!
We met some good friends of ours that we haven't seen in a long time at the Bonfire. It was so good to see them! As always, Elijah was a little ham and was incredibly good. What other baby would sit happily in his high chair for two hours, not fussing once, just eating Cheerios and smiling at everyone who walked by? At the end of dinner they brought out a cake for him. He dug his hands in it and licked the frosting in delight. It was really cute. We got some pics of the lunar eclipse! It's so cool that that happened on Elijah's first birthday. Saturday is the big birthday party! Elijah can't wait for more cake!
He likes you, Neal! You're a natural. I wish we could have seen your sweet baby girl last night, too. We miss you!
AAaaww, so cute.
Jon and Anna, the cutest skydiving couple we know. We miss you guys, too!
Anna is sooo pretty!
Fire!
Mmmmmm, frosting so good
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Happy birthday, little one
Happy first birthday, Elijah!
Ever since I found out I was pregnant with you, I have kept an Elijah journal (in addition to the journaling I've done on this blog). I try to write in it often, talking about what we've been up to recently and what cute new things you've been doing. One of my favorite entries I made in this journal was the story of your birth. I thought this would be an appropriate entry to share today, exactly one year after you entered this world. I wrote the entry in March of 2007.
I want to thank you for choosing ME as your mama and for being such a good, STRONG, fun boy for us this first year of your life. You amaze me every single day! Hugs and smooches to you, little one. Happy birthday.
Love, Mama
Your birth
3/17/07
Welcome to the world, Elijah Daniel! You were born four weeks premature on February 20, 2007. The day before, it was a Monday, I had a routine appointment with my doctor to check your growth. We did the weekly dreaded ultrasound and saw that you were still growing very slowly in my tummy. The doctor worried us a bit and told us some scary things to possibly be prepared for. When we got home, I couldn't handle the worry anymore and I did a lot of crying. Daddy did a good job of comforting me, but I know he was really scared and tired of all the worry, too. I had a serious talk with God that night. A very serious talk! I told Him that we'd had enough and that we couldn't take any more of this particular "chapter." I told Him to do something, anything, because I loved you and wanted to know you were going to be safe and I didn't want to feel beat down anymore. Every doctor's appointment we had gone to while I was pregnant brought more bad news. Every car ride home had an even sadder, heavier feel than the car ride before.
Eight hours after my very serious talk with God, at 2:30 in the morning, I woke up abruptly from a strange "punch" in my tummy. The punch was scary. It felt like someone had kicked you around and like you were bouncing off the walls of my insides. It turns out that was actually my water breaking, but I didn't realize this until later because none of the water had come out yet. Then I felt a very intense pain that I thought for sure meant that I was going to be sick. I started heading to the bathroom when I realized it was more than just that. The pain was coming in waves and was very intense. Daddy called the doctor and they told us to come in as fast as we could. On the way to the hospital I continued to have contractions about 5 minutes apart. Ouch! They were painful! At that point I knew that we'd be meeting you in a few short hours. I was very scared and very excited all at the same time.
When we were about 10 minutes away from the hospital, I felt a big gush of fluid soaking my pants. It was my water finally coming out. (Good thing we brought a towel!) By the time we got to the hospital, my contractions were very close together and they were getting more and more intense. I was dilated to 2 cm. Things started to progress really quickly. It was obvious you wanted out. I asked for an epidural to help with the pain, but we had some problems getting it in a timely manner. First of all, none of the nurses could find a good vein in my arms/hands to put an IV in, and an IV line was necessary for an epidural. At this point, I was in more pain than I'd ever been in in my life and I was screaming and asking WHERE IS MY EPIDURAL!?!? Daddy was wonderful. He helped to calm me down (as much as I could have been calmed in this situation) and kept reminding me to breathe. This went on for three hours.
Once they finally found someone who got the IV in my arm, they couldn't find an anesthesiologist. I was told that the doctor was on her way and wouldn't be there for 20-30 minutes. I said, "NO! I can't wait that long! I'll DIE!" Somehow I managed to cope through that last 30 minutes and when the doctor arrived I almost kissed her. I remember telling her how wonderful she was. I got the epidural and instantly felt a million times better. By then, I had dilated to 3-4 cm and then quickly to 7. You were coming fast! We had been monitoring your heart and it seemed like we'd be able to do a delivered birth. In just another little while, I was dilated to 9 cm and they were wheeling me into the delivery room.
Dr. Saul had me push for an entire hour. I remember feeling like I had no idea what I was doing. I had a constant feeling that I wasn't doing it right. Your heart rate kept dropping to a scary range and the doctor didn't like that (neither did I, it was freaking me out!), so after a failed attempt to "vacuum" you out, she called for an emergency c-section. Once this decision was made, I started to get really scared. Suddenly there were about 50 people in the room getting me ready for surgery. Daddy was still doing such a good job trying to make me feel calm. The doctor cut into my belly and I realized that I could feel the incision being made! That wasn't good, so they decided to completely sedate me and that meant that Dad had to leave the room. I was pretty upset about him having to go, but then the world went blank and I was out like a light.
It turns out that your umbilical cord was pretty short, so that's probably why you couldn't come out the natural way. You were born at 9:55 am on that Tuesday. When I woke up I was in a lot of pain and Grandma was holding my hand. I asked how you were doing and she said, "He's perfect!" I had a really talkative nurse who was giving me every different drug under the sun in an attempt to lessen the pain. You had been taken to the NICU right away and Daddy went with you. Later they wheeled me in my bed down to see you. I was very drugged up and feeling loopy, but I'll never forget seeing you that first moment. You were incredible and so beautiful! You had so much dark hair and such a sweet little perfect face. I loved you instantly. I only got a moment with you because I was wheeled back to my room to recuperate from surgery. Luckily, I was able to watch you from my room. There was a camera pointed on you in the NICU that I could watch on the tv. I didn't take my eyes off you. I watched the nurses draw blood and listen to your heart and poke around on you. I sat for hours and stared at your sweetness. Thankfully, Grandma and Grandpa and Auntie Lissa were there with you almost the whole time. Daddy wheeled me down later so I could spend some time with you.
We found out your official heart diagnosis that day. You have Tetralogy of Fallot with Pulmonary Atresia and MAPCAs. Thanks to the MAPCAs, we are able to hold off for a few months on your first heart surgery. That was a blessing that we didn't expect. We also found out that your right kidney appeared to have never developed, so you were operating on just your left kidney. You stayed in the NICU for almost a week and Dad and I visited you every chance we could. Once I healed up enough from my c-section to be released from the hospital, we were by your side constantly.
Little by little, you gained strength and almost all the wires and tubes were removed from you. You got transferred to the ICC, which is a step below the NICU, so that meant you were getting stronger. The doctors performed a lot of tests on you and you were such a strong little guy! You were so well-tempered and you kept showing us over and over that you were going to be just fine. Your one kidney was working great (with a jump-start from a little medication) and your blood-oxygen levels were fantastic, considering your heart issue. Dad and I lived there in the hospital with you and we fed and held you as often as possible. You were such a good baby! A lot of the other babies in that same unit cried a lot. I remember Gage, in particular. He was the screaming baby at the end of the hall that everyone talked about and none of the nurses wanted to get assigned to. The nurses loved being assigned to you, though, because you were so easy and good.
After two weeks of being in the hospital, we were able to take you home. You still had an NG tube (for feeding) in your nose, but we just wanted you home with us. Two days after we got home, we had to bring you back to the hospital because you weren't taking your bottles as well as you had been and you were breathing extra hard. It turns out that you were having congestive heart failure, so they increased your dose of Lasix and that helped out tremendously. Daddy and I were both shocked at how quickly that extra dose of Lasix turned you around. You instantly started eating well and breathing better and we got to bring you home again two days later.
We have now had you here for one whole week and you are doing great! We pulled your NG tube out because you have been eating your bottles like a champ! You weighed 4 lbs. 14 oz. when you were born and as of yesterday you weighed 5 lbs. 12 oz. You're growing so well! Our goal is to get you as big as possible for your first surgery, so weight gain is very good to see. Your dad and I have completely fallen in love with you. You are such a wonderful baby. I thank God every day that it was His plan for you to be here with us right now and that you're healthy and STRONG. Oh Elijah, you are so very strong. Some days I feel like you are light years ahead of us and that you have things completely under control. I love you so much, my sweet little man, and I look forward to living life with you.
Right now you are snoozing in your vibrating bouncy chair. You look so cute in your St. Patrick's Day shirt (from Gina) and wrapped up in Grandma Pauline's blankie.
Love,
Your proud mama
Ever since I found out I was pregnant with you, I have kept an Elijah journal (in addition to the journaling I've done on this blog). I try to write in it often, talking about what we've been up to recently and what cute new things you've been doing. One of my favorite entries I made in this journal was the story of your birth. I thought this would be an appropriate entry to share today, exactly one year after you entered this world. I wrote the entry in March of 2007.
I want to thank you for choosing ME as your mama and for being such a good, STRONG, fun boy for us this first year of your life. You amaze me every single day! Hugs and smooches to you, little one. Happy birthday.
Love, Mama
Your birth
3/17/07
Welcome to the world, Elijah Daniel! You were born four weeks premature on February 20, 2007. The day before, it was a Monday, I had a routine appointment with my doctor to check your growth. We did the weekly dreaded ultrasound and saw that you were still growing very slowly in my tummy. The doctor worried us a bit and told us some scary things to possibly be prepared for. When we got home, I couldn't handle the worry anymore and I did a lot of crying. Daddy did a good job of comforting me, but I know he was really scared and tired of all the worry, too. I had a serious talk with God that night. A very serious talk! I told Him that we'd had enough and that we couldn't take any more of this particular "chapter." I told Him to do something, anything, because I loved you and wanted to know you were going to be safe and I didn't want to feel beat down anymore. Every doctor's appointment we had gone to while I was pregnant brought more bad news. Every car ride home had an even sadder, heavier feel than the car ride before.
Eight hours after my very serious talk with God, at 2:30 in the morning, I woke up abruptly from a strange "punch" in my tummy. The punch was scary. It felt like someone had kicked you around and like you were bouncing off the walls of my insides. It turns out that was actually my water breaking, but I didn't realize this until later because none of the water had come out yet. Then I felt a very intense pain that I thought for sure meant that I was going to be sick. I started heading to the bathroom when I realized it was more than just that. The pain was coming in waves and was very intense. Daddy called the doctor and they told us to come in as fast as we could. On the way to the hospital I continued to have contractions about 5 minutes apart. Ouch! They were painful! At that point I knew that we'd be meeting you in a few short hours. I was very scared and very excited all at the same time.
When we were about 10 minutes away from the hospital, I felt a big gush of fluid soaking my pants. It was my water finally coming out. (Good thing we brought a towel!) By the time we got to the hospital, my contractions were very close together and they were getting more and more intense. I was dilated to 2 cm. Things started to progress really quickly. It was obvious you wanted out. I asked for an epidural to help with the pain, but we had some problems getting it in a timely manner. First of all, none of the nurses could find a good vein in my arms/hands to put an IV in, and an IV line was necessary for an epidural. At this point, I was in more pain than I'd ever been in in my life and I was screaming and asking WHERE IS MY EPIDURAL!?!? Daddy was wonderful. He helped to calm me down (as much as I could have been calmed in this situation) and kept reminding me to breathe. This went on for three hours.
Once they finally found someone who got the IV in my arm, they couldn't find an anesthesiologist. I was told that the doctor was on her way and wouldn't be there for 20-30 minutes. I said, "NO! I can't wait that long! I'll DIE!" Somehow I managed to cope through that last 30 minutes and when the doctor arrived I almost kissed her. I remember telling her how wonderful she was. I got the epidural and instantly felt a million times better. By then, I had dilated to 3-4 cm and then quickly to 7. You were coming fast! We had been monitoring your heart and it seemed like we'd be able to do a delivered birth. In just another little while, I was dilated to 9 cm and they were wheeling me into the delivery room.
Dr. Saul had me push for an entire hour. I remember feeling like I had no idea what I was doing. I had a constant feeling that I wasn't doing it right. Your heart rate kept dropping to a scary range and the doctor didn't like that (neither did I, it was freaking me out!), so after a failed attempt to "vacuum" you out, she called for an emergency c-section. Once this decision was made, I started to get really scared. Suddenly there were about 50 people in the room getting me ready for surgery. Daddy was still doing such a good job trying to make me feel calm. The doctor cut into my belly and I realized that I could feel the incision being made! That wasn't good, so they decided to completely sedate me and that meant that Dad had to leave the room. I was pretty upset about him having to go, but then the world went blank and I was out like a light.
It turns out that your umbilical cord was pretty short, so that's probably why you couldn't come out the natural way. You were born at 9:55 am on that Tuesday. When I woke up I was in a lot of pain and Grandma was holding my hand. I asked how you were doing and she said, "He's perfect!" I had a really talkative nurse who was giving me every different drug under the sun in an attempt to lessen the pain. You had been taken to the NICU right away and Daddy went with you. Later they wheeled me in my bed down to see you. I was very drugged up and feeling loopy, but I'll never forget seeing you that first moment. You were incredible and so beautiful! You had so much dark hair and such a sweet little perfect face. I loved you instantly. I only got a moment with you because I was wheeled back to my room to recuperate from surgery. Luckily, I was able to watch you from my room. There was a camera pointed on you in the NICU that I could watch on the tv. I didn't take my eyes off you. I watched the nurses draw blood and listen to your heart and poke around on you. I sat for hours and stared at your sweetness. Thankfully, Grandma and Grandpa and Auntie Lissa were there with you almost the whole time. Daddy wheeled me down later so I could spend some time with you.
We found out your official heart diagnosis that day. You have Tetralogy of Fallot with Pulmonary Atresia and MAPCAs. Thanks to the MAPCAs, we are able to hold off for a few months on your first heart surgery. That was a blessing that we didn't expect. We also found out that your right kidney appeared to have never developed, so you were operating on just your left kidney. You stayed in the NICU for almost a week and Dad and I visited you every chance we could. Once I healed up enough from my c-section to be released from the hospital, we were by your side constantly.
Little by little, you gained strength and almost all the wires and tubes were removed from you. You got transferred to the ICC, which is a step below the NICU, so that meant you were getting stronger. The doctors performed a lot of tests on you and you were such a strong little guy! You were so well-tempered and you kept showing us over and over that you were going to be just fine. Your one kidney was working great (with a jump-start from a little medication) and your blood-oxygen levels were fantastic, considering your heart issue. Dad and I lived there in the hospital with you and we fed and held you as often as possible. You were such a good baby! A lot of the other babies in that same unit cried a lot. I remember Gage, in particular. He was the screaming baby at the end of the hall that everyone talked about and none of the nurses wanted to get assigned to. The nurses loved being assigned to you, though, because you were so easy and good.
After two weeks of being in the hospital, we were able to take you home. You still had an NG tube (for feeding) in your nose, but we just wanted you home with us. Two days after we got home, we had to bring you back to the hospital because you weren't taking your bottles as well as you had been and you were breathing extra hard. It turns out that you were having congestive heart failure, so they increased your dose of Lasix and that helped out tremendously. Daddy and I were both shocked at how quickly that extra dose of Lasix turned you around. You instantly started eating well and breathing better and we got to bring you home again two days later.
We have now had you here for one whole week and you are doing great! We pulled your NG tube out because you have been eating your bottles like a champ! You weighed 4 lbs. 14 oz. when you were born and as of yesterday you weighed 5 lbs. 12 oz. You're growing so well! Our goal is to get you as big as possible for your first surgery, so weight gain is very good to see. Your dad and I have completely fallen in love with you. You are such a wonderful baby. I thank God every day that it was His plan for you to be here with us right now and that you're healthy and STRONG. Oh Elijah, you are so very strong. Some days I feel like you are light years ahead of us and that you have things completely under control. I love you so much, my sweet little man, and I look forward to living life with you.
Right now you are snoozing in your vibrating bouncy chair. You look so cute in your St. Patrick's Day shirt (from Gina) and wrapped up in Grandma Pauline's blankie.
Love,
Your proud mama
Monday, February 18, 2008
Unwanted club membership
Being a part of this heart world is something that we never wanted. No one asks to be in this club. It's a world filled with uncertainty and worry and panic attacks and hospitals. But under the surface, there are actually perks of being a member. It allows us parents to experience a whole different dimension of life that would have otherwise gone unexplored. In our exploration of this new life, Dan and I have met so many amazing people. It has been invaluable getting to know other families who are dealing with similar issues and it's also very rewarding to be able to lend support to them when they need it. We are now a part of this club that no one wants to be in but at the same time we all love being in because the people we've met are EXTRAORDINARY and they have EXTRAORDINARY babies.
We have received so much love, kindness and support from people who we've never even met. We recently received a Valentine's Day package from Krista, mom of Angel Kate. It was so thoughtful and perfect! Thank you for your kindness, Krista. It has been such an honor to have gotten to know your precious baby girl before she had to go home to Heaven. Elijah adores his new book (and I plan on devouring the candy.....yummmmm). This sweet little book will be our way of having a part of Kate in our house forever.
Another one of my most favorite heart mamas, Samantha, has also been very thoughtful and giving throughout this journey. In addition to being an amazing source of support, she made and sent Elijah an embroidered VERY SOFT blanket a while back and now she's sending him a birthday gift! What a spoiled boy! Samantha, you have been one of my main sources of comfort in this journey.
I love all of you heart parents so much. I don't know what I'd do without you. Honestly. I get overwhelmed seeing the selfless generosity and kind words and encouragement coming from every one of you and I'm so thankful for it. I adore you all and I truly care about and love your precious babies. Thank you for the constant stream of amazing love and support and also for sharing your lives with us.
Ok, now we all need to meet in person! What a perfect excuse to go somewhere warm! Get ready, Kathy and Terri, we're all coming to your houses.
p.s. I just re-read this post and it totally appears like I'm saying that sending us gifts is the only thing that equals kindness. NNOoooo! Not what I meant. I just wanted to thank these two ladies for taking the time to send Elijah a little something, but I most definitely don't expect that in the least. From anyone! Reading an encouraging comment or knowing that someone said a special prayer for our boy or even just taking the time to read this blog is enough for me!
Enjoying the new book before bedtime. Thanks, Krista!
The book is perfect. It talks about how if our little boy weren't a part of our world, we'd have holes in our hearts. Aaw.
We have received so much love, kindness and support from people who we've never even met. We recently received a Valentine's Day package from Krista, mom of Angel Kate. It was so thoughtful and perfect! Thank you for your kindness, Krista. It has been such an honor to have gotten to know your precious baby girl before she had to go home to Heaven. Elijah adores his new book (and I plan on devouring the candy.....yummmmm). This sweet little book will be our way of having a part of Kate in our house forever.
Another one of my most favorite heart mamas, Samantha, has also been very thoughtful and giving throughout this journey. In addition to being an amazing source of support, she made and sent Elijah an embroidered VERY SOFT blanket a while back and now she's sending him a birthday gift! What a spoiled boy! Samantha, you have been one of my main sources of comfort in this journey.
I love all of you heart parents so much. I don't know what I'd do without you. Honestly. I get overwhelmed seeing the selfless generosity and kind words and encouragement coming from every one of you and I'm so thankful for it. I adore you all and I truly care about and love your precious babies. Thank you for the constant stream of amazing love and support and also for sharing your lives with us.
Ok, now we all need to meet in person! What a perfect excuse to go somewhere warm! Get ready, Kathy and Terri, we're all coming to your houses.
p.s. I just re-read this post and it totally appears like I'm saying that sending us gifts is the only thing that equals kindness. NNOoooo! Not what I meant. I just wanted to thank these two ladies for taking the time to send Elijah a little something, but I most definitely don't expect that in the least. From anyone! Reading an encouraging comment or knowing that someone said a special prayer for our boy or even just taking the time to read this blog is enough for me!
Enjoying the new book before bedtime. Thanks, Krista!
The book is perfect. It talks about how if our little boy weren't a part of our world, we'd have holes in our hearts. Aaw.
Friday, February 15, 2008
So mad at Mama!
Tonight when I got home from work I decided to perform a little test. We have been trying to show Elijah that he needs to WORK to get some things, since he seems so content staying wherever we put him. We can't always just place everything he wants right in front of him. So I brought him to his bedroom and put his play table on one side of him (just out of his reach) and his walker toy on the other side of him (just out of reach), thinking he might make some sort of effort to get to one of them. He looked at each toy, looked at me, gave me a pouty lower lip and started to cry his head off. I finally saved him after about five minutes of this because I only get an hour and a half a night with him the way it is. I'm not going to spend the whole time watching him be so unhappy! It took him a while before he warmed back up to me. He was so mad! Maybe I shouldn't have been taking pictures of his displeasure, either. (Sorry some of these pics are blurry. Our camera takes horribly blurry pics in low light. Arg, wish we would have known that before we spent hundreds of dollars on a camera!)
Mommy, Noooooo! Don't make me work!
I'm just gonna lie here and rest. And cry. This is too exhausting.
Thank goodness Mama rescued me. Sucker!
I'll think about forgiving you.
Here's a tiny smile.
Here's a pretty smile. I love you! Don't make me do work anymore.
I know eventually we do have to let him cry so he starts moving around. He's just so content!
Mommy, Noooooo! Don't make me work!
I'm just gonna lie here and rest. And cry. This is too exhausting.
Thank goodness Mama rescued me. Sucker!
I'll think about forgiving you.
Here's a tiny smile.
Here's a pretty smile. I love you! Don't make me do work anymore.
I know eventually we do have to let him cry so he starts moving around. He's just so content!
Thursday, February 14, 2008
It's Valentine's Day!
Elijah,
Thank you so much for the pretty Valentine's Day card! You are a smart boy. Very creative, too!
V-Day is a very meaningful day. Every year, it is the day chosen to promote awareness of congenital heart defects. This is something we plan to always celebrate and be a part of because we want the absolute best for you and the special heart that God gave to you. V-Day is also important because it is six days before your birthday and anything that is within a week of your birthday is automatically significant. Another reason V-Day is important is because it's a good chance to give extra love and hugs to the people you love. You just wait. I'm going to hug you and Daddy to pieces tonight!
Happy Valentine's Day, my chunky monkey.
Love, Mama
p.s. Some CHD statistics (from Children's Heart Foundation website):
Congenital heart defects are America's #1 birth defect. Nearly one of every 100 babies is born with a CHD.
Congenital heart defects are the #1 cause of birth defect related deaths.
This year almost 40,000 babies will be born with a congenital heart defect. 4,000 of them will not live to see their first birthday.
91,000 life years are lost each year in this country due to congenital heart defects.
The cost for inpatient surgery to repair congenital heart defects exceeds $2.2 billion a year.
Congenital heart defects occur frequently and are often life threatening, yet research into them is grossly under funded.
In the last decade death rates for congenital heart defects have declined by almost 30% due to advances made through research.
More than 50% of all children born with a congenital heart defect will require at least one invasive surgery in their lifetime.
There are 35 different types of congenital heart defects. Little is known about the cause of most them. There is not yet a cure for any of them.
In the U.S., twice as many children die from congenital heart defects each year than from all forms of childhood cancer combined, yet funding for pediatric cancer research is five times higher than funding for CHD.
Thank you so much for the pretty Valentine's Day card! You are a smart boy. Very creative, too!
V-Day is a very meaningful day. Every year, it is the day chosen to promote awareness of congenital heart defects. This is something we plan to always celebrate and be a part of because we want the absolute best for you and the special heart that God gave to you. V-Day is also important because it is six days before your birthday and anything that is within a week of your birthday is automatically significant. Another reason V-Day is important is because it's a good chance to give extra love and hugs to the people you love. You just wait. I'm going to hug you and Daddy to pieces tonight!
Happy Valentine's Day, my chunky monkey.
Love, Mama
p.s. Some CHD statistics (from Children's Heart Foundation website):
Congenital heart defects are America's #1 birth defect. Nearly one of every 100 babies is born with a CHD.
Congenital heart defects are the #1 cause of birth defect related deaths.
This year almost 40,000 babies will be born with a congenital heart defect. 4,000 of them will not live to see their first birthday.
91,000 life years are lost each year in this country due to congenital heart defects.
The cost for inpatient surgery to repair congenital heart defects exceeds $2.2 billion a year.
Congenital heart defects occur frequently and are often life threatening, yet research into them is grossly under funded.
In the last decade death rates for congenital heart defects have declined by almost 30% due to advances made through research.
More than 50% of all children born with a congenital heart defect will require at least one invasive surgery in their lifetime.
There are 35 different types of congenital heart defects. Little is known about the cause of most them. There is not yet a cure for any of them.
In the U.S., twice as many children die from congenital heart defects each year than from all forms of childhood cancer combined, yet funding for pediatric cancer research is five times higher than funding for CHD.
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
The cath lab is anxious to see us
Apparently Dr. Gremmels got to thinking about our little Elijah and decided that it would be best for him to get general anesthesia for his upcoming heart cath. The last time he had a cath without anesthesia, bad things happened. The anesthesia team is not available for us on March 27th, so we had to move the cath date up to March 19th, when they are available. That's like one month away! I suppose this is the time it is supposed to happen.
I realize I haven't posted pics in a while. Bad mama. I will do that soon, I promise. Maybe first I'll post pics of my stud hubby who went to see Rambo tonight with a friend DRESSED LIKE RAMBO. Yeah. So hot. I'm thinking they are being seriously laughed at in the theater right now.
I realize I haven't posted pics in a while. Bad mama. I will do that soon, I promise. Maybe first I'll post pics of my stud hubby who went to see Rambo tonight with a friend DRESSED LIKE RAMBO. Yeah. So hot. I'm thinking they are being seriously laughed at in the theater right now.
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Back to the cath lab
We are set for a March 27th heart cath with Dr. Gremmels. This will be Elijah's fourth heart cath! Dr. G will just be checking the pressures in his heart and taking pictures. No actual work will be done this time (we hope), so we probably won't even have to spend the night in the hospital (we hope).
I can't believe we are on the road to surgery. It's a scary road to be on, as we've been dreading this for quite a long time now, but in a way it feels good. Soon surgery #2 will be behind us!
On another note, we are in the process of doing some transitioning from bottles to sippy cups and from baby food to big people food. Elijah seems totally bored with the bottle lately, but he doesn't have the hang of the sippy cup yet. It's a bit frustrating. He will drink his bottle for a few chugs and then he'll start playing with it or he will just chew on the nipple and not drink from it. It takes forever to get a whole bottle into his belly. I guess I'm not entirely sure how this whole transition is supposed to happen. Hopefully Dr. Snook can shed some light at Eli's 1-year well visit next week. When it comes to solid foods, though, he eats like a little piggy. He loves cottage cheese more than anything in the world. If we have the cottage cheese container anywhere in sight while he is eating something else, he totally freaks out and needs the cottage cheese NOW.
We are still working with him on sign language. He doesn't do the signs consistently yet, but for the past two days, he will usually do the sign for "all done" if I say it out loud. Cute! Things are clicking in that sweet head of his! And as for his tummy time, HE STILL WON'T DO IT. Every once in a while he'll roll to his tummy on his own and stay there for a bit, but if we try to help him roll he will usually refuse it. He knows we're trying to make him do work. Smartypants Mr. Leisure! His leg strength is improving ever so slowly. He cannot stand on his own yet. We're getting there! Baby steps.
I can't believe we are on the road to surgery. It's a scary road to be on, as we've been dreading this for quite a long time now, but in a way it feels good. Soon surgery #2 will be behind us!
On another note, we are in the process of doing some transitioning from bottles to sippy cups and from baby food to big people food. Elijah seems totally bored with the bottle lately, but he doesn't have the hang of the sippy cup yet. It's a bit frustrating. He will drink his bottle for a few chugs and then he'll start playing with it or he will just chew on the nipple and not drink from it. It takes forever to get a whole bottle into his belly. I guess I'm not entirely sure how this whole transition is supposed to happen. Hopefully Dr. Snook can shed some light at Eli's 1-year well visit next week. When it comes to solid foods, though, he eats like a little piggy. He loves cottage cheese more than anything in the world. If we have the cottage cheese container anywhere in sight while he is eating something else, he totally freaks out and needs the cottage cheese NOW.
We are still working with him on sign language. He doesn't do the signs consistently yet, but for the past two days, he will usually do the sign for "all done" if I say it out loud. Cute! Things are clicking in that sweet head of his! And as for his tummy time, HE STILL WON'T DO IT. Every once in a while he'll roll to his tummy on his own and stay there for a bit, but if we try to help him roll he will usually refuse it. He knows we're trying to make him do work. Smartypants Mr. Leisure! His leg strength is improving ever so slowly. He cannot stand on his own yet. We're getting there! Baby steps.
Monday, February 11, 2008
Early
I decided that Elijah's nickname is going to be "Earl" (short for "Early") because everything he does, he does early. He was born early, he tried to be born REALLY early, he had his first heart surgery earlier than expected, he goes to bed early at night, he wakes up VERY EARLY in the morning. And now, it looks like his second heart surgery is going to come early as well.
What we learned, after spending hours in the clinic this morning and getting an echo (ultrasound of the heart), is that Elijah is growing very well, so the conduit (acting as a valve) in his heart is on the verge of being too small for him. His O2 sats right now are running between 76-78%, so that's a sign that we are on the path toward surgery. We're no longer waiting to step onto the path. We are on the path! Yikes! We are going to schedule a heart cath for March or April, and based on the results of that, we will schedule his open heart surgery appropriately. It looks like we may be looking at a May surgery. Possibly sooner, probably not any later.
So this is good news. He has no fluid build-up and his heart function looks perfect. He's just a champ who eats well and grows quickly! His weight this morning was 22 lbs., 12 oz. He's huge! I love it! He has gained 4.5 lbs in just two months. Dr. Gremmels said, "This is phenomenal!"
I love Dr. Gremmels. He has to be one of the best doctors on the planet. He always makes me feel a million times better. I wonder if he does psychotherapy as well? Maybe I'll call him when I'm having a bad day and he can help talk me through it? :)
Thanks for checking in on us and for all the words of encouragement!
I almost forgot to mention that the G-man said he would have been completely comfortable allowing Elijah to get his hypospadias surgery tomorrow. Ug! I wish I wouldn't have canceled it. We can't really reschedule now, since we'd be going into March and since we don't want to get too close to heart stuff. Oh well, looks like now we'll just wait till next fall.
What we learned, after spending hours in the clinic this morning and getting an echo (ultrasound of the heart), is that Elijah is growing very well, so the conduit (acting as a valve) in his heart is on the verge of being too small for him. His O2 sats right now are running between 76-78%, so that's a sign that we are on the path toward surgery. We're no longer waiting to step onto the path. We are on the path! Yikes! We are going to schedule a heart cath for March or April, and based on the results of that, we will schedule his open heart surgery appropriately. It looks like we may be looking at a May surgery. Possibly sooner, probably not any later.
So this is good news. He has no fluid build-up and his heart function looks perfect. He's just a champ who eats well and grows quickly! His weight this morning was 22 lbs., 12 oz. He's huge! I love it! He has gained 4.5 lbs in just two months. Dr. Gremmels said, "This is phenomenal!"
I love Dr. Gremmels. He has to be one of the best doctors on the planet. He always makes me feel a million times better. I wonder if he does psychotherapy as well? Maybe I'll call him when I'm having a bad day and he can help talk me through it? :)
Thanks for checking in on us and for all the words of encouragement!
I almost forgot to mention that the G-man said he would have been completely comfortable allowing Elijah to get his hypospadias surgery tomorrow. Ug! I wish I wouldn't have canceled it. We can't really reschedule now, since we'd be going into March and since we don't want to get too close to heart stuff. Oh well, looks like now we'll just wait till next fall.
Friday, February 8, 2008
Quick update
I talked Dr. G's nurse into getting us in on Monday morning. This makes me feel much better. We just have to have faith that things will happen when they are supposed to happen!
Thursday, February 7, 2008
The honeymoon? It's over.
I feel sick to my stomach. We learned some potential bad news this afternoon and I'm just sick over it. We brought Elijah to see his pediatrician because of a rash he has in his diaper region. While we were there, we figured we would get the pre-surgery physical (for his hypospadias) out of the way, which was supposed to take place next Tuesday (not anymore). Well, he didn't pass his physical. His liver is enlarged and his oxygen sats are down to 75%. These things most likely point to heart failure. Either he has fluid build-up, which means a bit of Lasix might help out. Or it could mean that he is outgrowing the shunt in his heart and that the dreaded Big Surgery is a lot closer than we had thought. We have an appointment with Dr. Gremmels in two weeks, so I'm sure we will get a better idea of things then.
We have had such a nice break from heart-related issues for so long now. It's almost like I have convinced myself that Elijah is a healthy baby. He eats well and continues to gain awesome weight and certainly doesn't act like he's sick at all. Today I was jolted back into reality. He IS a sick boy. And he might need surgery soon.
I just don't feel prepared for this, if this is the road we have to go down right now. It's much different this time. Elijah is an actual little person with a personality and character. I don't feel strong enough to face this right now. I don't want to hand my precious boy over to the anesthesiologists and endure it all over again.
But I have to be strong for all of us, especially for our sweet Elijah. He needs a strong mama. And I need to stop being such a whiner. We could really have it so much worse. Sorry for the bad attitude and giant blog rant. I'll feel better tomorrow.
We have had such a nice break from heart-related issues for so long now. It's almost like I have convinced myself that Elijah is a healthy baby. He eats well and continues to gain awesome weight and certainly doesn't act like he's sick at all. Today I was jolted back into reality. He IS a sick boy. And he might need surgery soon.
I just don't feel prepared for this, if this is the road we have to go down right now. It's much different this time. Elijah is an actual little person with a personality and character. I don't feel strong enough to face this right now. I don't want to hand my precious boy over to the anesthesiologists and endure it all over again.
But I have to be strong for all of us, especially for our sweet Elijah. He needs a strong mama. And I need to stop being such a whiner. We could really have it so much worse. Sorry for the bad attitude and giant blog rant. I'll feel better tomorrow.
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
More more more
I know I already posted today, but I have to brag about something, so you have to deal with me one more time. We have been letting Elijah watch Baby Signing Time videos for a few months now. We really want him to learn sign language so we can communicate with him before he can talk. He looooooves the videos. He smiles and giggles and dances and is in total baby heaven every time we let him watch them. So tonight I was cleaning up the kitchen after dinner and Elijah was sitting in his high chair munching on some Cheerios. I started singing one of his favorite BST songs called More More More. In the middle of singing, I looked over and saw our smartypants boy doing the sign for MORE! I started squealing and clapping and yelling YAY ELIJAH! He looked at me like WHAT MOM?! OF COURSE I CAN DO THIS.
I love it!
I love it!
Healthy, wealthy and wise
If the saying has any truth to it, Elijah is pretty much guaranteed health, wealth and wisdom. He has always gone to bed early and gotten up early, but lately he's going to bed even earlier and waking up earlier. Now, one would think that if we put him to bed later, he would wake up later, right? It seems intuitive, but that's not how it works with him. We have tried that and all it does is make him totally sleep deprived because he gets up at the same time every morning no matter what time he goes down. We have been putting him down for the night around 6:15 pm because he is so completely exhausted by then. He sleeps solid until about 4:30 am and then he's up and talking and playing in his crib until 6:00 am, when we finally get him out. We have a rule in our house that we have stood by since Day 1. We do not get Elijah out of his crib until 6:00 am, unless he's sick or hurt, of course. He knows that 6:00 means freedom, so that is usually when he starts to cry. The kid has an amazing internal clock. So we are wondering what we should be doing differently, or if this is just another sleep adjustment period, which is entirely possible. Tim and Katie, we love the book that your pediatrician, "The Bluth," wrote and we have followed a lot of his principles. According to what he has told you about your boys, would you say we should be putting Elijah down even earlier? What times and for how long do your boys nap?
So with all that said, we have been a bit sleep deprived lately. It's hard not to hear the constant stream of baby talk, grunts and giggles coming from the next room, starting between 4:30 and 5:00 every morning. Last weekend we went to Bemidji to visit some friends so we were able to hear all the baby noises in full stereo sound both mornings since his pack 'n play was a few feet from our bed. However, the lack of sleep didn't matter to us then because we got to spend some quality time with our friends Kendis and Chris. Oh, and Summit the puppy! They live out in the woods on a few acres of land, so it is a very peaceful place. Because we're trying to get Elijah as much sleep as possible these days, we hung around their house most of the time, which was just fine with us. We did get out to see Paul and Babe, though! Saturday night after Elijah went to bed, Chris and Kendis grilled us yummy steaks and then the four of us played Deal or No Deal and we had a blast with that. Thanks, guys, for the fun little getaway. We love your cozy home in the northern woods. Tell Summy that Elijah wishes he could have gotten more puppy kisses.
I had a message on my phone from the hospital this morning, wanting to pre-register Elijah for his surgery. My first thought was, why are they calling so far in advance? His surgery isn't for another couple of weeks! Then I looked at the calendar and realized that his surgery is one week from today! AGGHGhghghhh! We're probably only going to be in the hospital for one night and it should be a fairly standard procedure, but still, the thought of hospital time gives me the willies. I know, I know, I need to stop being a cry baby and suck it up. It will be one more hurdle to put behind us. It will feel really good to get this done.
If you haven't already, please see our information about this year's Heart Walk. We decided to help raise money for this event obviously because of Elijah, but it's a nice way to celebrate Dan's dad's life, as well. He also has heart disease and has dealt with some pretty major stuff. We are definitely a heart family! Thanks for your support in this.
Ok, now for pictures...
Paul's giant legs (look at that sweet baby face)
Daddy and Elijah picking Babe's newly renovated nose
Sweet, spaghetti-stained face
The Portas and Paul
Mmmmmmm...horse with giant teeth tastes yummy
So with all that said, we have been a bit sleep deprived lately. It's hard not to hear the constant stream of baby talk, grunts and giggles coming from the next room, starting between 4:30 and 5:00 every morning. Last weekend we went to Bemidji to visit some friends so we were able to hear all the baby noises in full stereo sound both mornings since his pack 'n play was a few feet from our bed. However, the lack of sleep didn't matter to us then because we got to spend some quality time with our friends Kendis and Chris. Oh, and Summit the puppy! They live out in the woods on a few acres of land, so it is a very peaceful place. Because we're trying to get Elijah as much sleep as possible these days, we hung around their house most of the time, which was just fine with us. We did get out to see Paul and Babe, though! Saturday night after Elijah went to bed, Chris and Kendis grilled us yummy steaks and then the four of us played Deal or No Deal and we had a blast with that. Thanks, guys, for the fun little getaway. We love your cozy home in the northern woods. Tell Summy that Elijah wishes he could have gotten more puppy kisses.
I had a message on my phone from the hospital this morning, wanting to pre-register Elijah for his surgery. My first thought was, why are they calling so far in advance? His surgery isn't for another couple of weeks! Then I looked at the calendar and realized that his surgery is one week from today! AGGHGhghghhh! We're probably only going to be in the hospital for one night and it should be a fairly standard procedure, but still, the thought of hospital time gives me the willies. I know, I know, I need to stop being a cry baby and suck it up. It will be one more hurdle to put behind us. It will feel really good to get this done.
If you haven't already, please see our information about this year's Heart Walk. We decided to help raise money for this event obviously because of Elijah, but it's a nice way to celebrate Dan's dad's life, as well. He also has heart disease and has dealt with some pretty major stuff. We are definitely a heart family! Thanks for your support in this.
Ok, now for pictures...
Paul's giant legs (look at that sweet baby face)
Daddy and Elijah picking Babe's newly renovated nose
Sweet, spaghetti-stained face
The Portas and Paul
Mmmmmmm...horse with giant teeth tastes yummy
Monday, February 4, 2008
Family photo
I'll post pics from our weekend away later tonight. In the meantime, here is the photo we had taken at the Zinpro Christmas party in December. I love Elijah's cute smirky smile. I could just eat him up.
Friday, February 1, 2008
Useless Information Part II
We are heading up to the northern woods in a little bit to visit our awesome friends Kendis and Chris for the weekend. Elijah is excited to see bears and deer and Summit the puppy! I'm sure we'll have some fun stories and photos to share when we get back. In the meantime, here is some useless, strange information that you probably couldn't care less about. Peruse through them if you'd like.
Keywords that led people to this blog:
A lot of people are apparently seeking information about sacral dimples
Sacral dimples around the world
Sacral dimple crevice
Sacral dimple gross motor
Hypospadias sacral dimple
Sacral dimple + kidney
Sacral dimple after amniocentesis
Arm flapping and grunting are also big concerns
5 mo old arm flapping
Baby arm flapping
Prematurity and arm flapping
What does arm flapping look like
Why does my baby do this arm flapping thing
Picture of arm flapping
Videos on arm flapping in babies
Newborn flapping arms grunting
Video on infant grunting
Some unique entries
Thirty year old combover
Chub thighs
Boppy Baldness [this was entered 3 separate times by 3 separate people..??]
Male pattern baldness has to start at front
9 month old with large head [sorry that you’re searchable on google because of your large head, Elijah]
Cute thigh pictures
Buzz his hair
Beast tube
Daniel groin
How to give a dog nebulizer treatments [a surprising repeat from last time]
Head bobbing in tired babies
Keywords that led people to this blog:
A lot of people are apparently seeking information about sacral dimples
Sacral dimples around the world
Sacral dimple crevice
Sacral dimple gross motor
Hypospadias sacral dimple
Sacral dimple + kidney
Sacral dimple after amniocentesis
Arm flapping and grunting are also big concerns
5 mo old arm flapping
Baby arm flapping
Prematurity and arm flapping
What does arm flapping look like
Why does my baby do this arm flapping thing
Picture of arm flapping
Videos on arm flapping in babies
Newborn flapping arms grunting
Video on infant grunting
Some unique entries
Thirty year old combover
Chub thighs
Boppy Baldness [this was entered 3 separate times by 3 separate people..??]
Male pattern baldness has to start at front
9 month old with large head [sorry that you’re searchable on google because of your large head, Elijah]
Cute thigh pictures
Buzz his hair
Beast tube
Daniel groin
How to give a dog nebulizer treatments [a surprising repeat from last time]
Head bobbing in tired babies
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Do I really have to cut this?
I realize Elijah is not a girl, but do I really have to cut off these beautiful, curly locks?
It always gets so curly after a bath.
What is this face?? (Don't mind the dirty Daddy socks in the background. I guess it's time to buy my hubby new socks.)
It always gets so curly after a bath.
What is this face?? (Don't mind the dirty Daddy socks in the background. I guess it's time to buy my hubby new socks.)
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Getting out
We just got back from our trip to the Dells. We had a great time. We didn't spend as much time in the pools/waterpark as we would have liked, but we found out that this resort wasn't exactly designed for 11-month-olds. We set Elijah in the 6-inch-deep pool, but he just shivered and looked at us like IT'S COLD IN HERE WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME so we took him out. Dan went down a few slides at lightning speed. His water slide rule of thumb is: shoulder blades and heels! According to this rule, those are the only things that should touch the slide, which means that he flies down them, and exits the slides at speeds faster than our eyes can process. Elijah and I had a good time trying to keep up with him. Normally I would like to participate in these types of things as well but it turns out that I would have rather just hung out with my son.
I haven't mentioned that the reason we went to the Dells in the first place is because we got a deal from BG Vacations. We got a hotel room for two nights and access to the waterpark for $59 total, which is great. BUT. We also had to attend the obligatory 90-minute presentation about buying a lifetime vacation opportunity, blah blah. We have been to these things before so we knew what to expect. When we got there, though, we were blown away by the fakeness and the cheesiness surrounding us. We did a lot of eye rolling back and forth at each other. We ended up spending much more than 90 minutes there but in the end, Dan told them, "We are totally using you for the cheap vacation. We aren't going to buy this. Sorry." It was awesome. At these things, though, they don't take no for an answer that easily. The "closer" swooped in on us and continued his quest to try to get us to spend $25,000 on the spot, when Elijah did THE MOST AWESOME THING OF ALL TIME. As we said no for the third time, and the Closer again tried to get our credit card number, Elijah looked straight at the guy, DEAD in the eye, and started yelling at him: BAHHHHH! Ah! AAAHHH! Ba! AHAHAaaahhh! HA! Ba. He never lost eye contact. Everyone around the table was stunned by his impeccable timing as they uncomfortably laughed. Dan and I knew he was telling the guy off and we looked at each other like, YES! Our son has our back! Two seconds later, we were out the door to enjoy the rest of our trip. Well done, little man.
Despite this awkward two hours, we had a really nice time together as a family. Even though it's a little extra work performing baby duties away from home, it is so refreshing to be in a different place for a few days. Elijah is a good traveler and that is a wonderful thing because we plan on showing him many places.
This is the toy car we won by spending $20 worth of tokens playing Deal or No Deal
Daddy got too tired driving home so Elijah took over for a bit
Oh yeah, we bought Elijah a new Jeep! I think he's ready. Actually, we bought this because it has wheels on the bottom. We're hoping it might encourage leg usage.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Surgery is set
Dr. Gremmels cleared Elijah for hypospadias surgery, so the date is set for February 12th. It should be a 2 to 2.5-hour surgery and he'll need to stay in the hospital for one night. It will be good to get this out of the way. One more hurdle behind us.
We are heading out of town for a few days. We're going to the Wisconsin Dells to let Elijah splash around in the indoor pools. I will likely take plenty of pictures and share them when we get back (sorry for the lack of pictures this week, I was focusing on the Heart Walk. Please help Team Elijah, if you haven't already!).
I can't possibly write without saying something about the chubby boy, right? He has been really fun to spend time with lately. I have spent every waking, non-working minute with him because I don't want to miss any of the cuteness! It's strange, though, because I'm starting to wonder why he will accomplish a developmental goal and then he will stop doing it. It's like he wants to show us he can do something and then he gets bored with it. He was trying to clap his hands when he was four months old. He did it for a few weeks, and I haven't seen him do it ONE TIME since then. I know he can do it! He claps his blocks together all the time. He just won't do it with his hands. He was saying Mamamamamamamama over and over two months ago. He did that for a few weeks, and now he won't do it anymore. He did the motions to the Itsy Bitsy Spider over a month ago ALL BY HIMSELF and I haven't seen him do it again since. The same thing goes for physical accomplishments. We have seen him bear weight on his legs. He knows how to do it, he just won't! We know he can use his arms much more than he does. What's up with this? Stubbornness? Laziness?
We are heading out of town for a few days. We're going to the Wisconsin Dells to let Elijah splash around in the indoor pools. I will likely take plenty of pictures and share them when we get back (sorry for the lack of pictures this week, I was focusing on the Heart Walk. Please help Team Elijah, if you haven't already!).
I can't possibly write without saying something about the chubby boy, right? He has been really fun to spend time with lately. I have spent every waking, non-working minute with him because I don't want to miss any of the cuteness! It's strange, though, because I'm starting to wonder why he will accomplish a developmental goal and then he will stop doing it. It's like he wants to show us he can do something and then he gets bored with it. He was trying to clap his hands when he was four months old. He did it for a few weeks, and I haven't seen him do it ONE TIME since then. I know he can do it! He claps his blocks together all the time. He just won't do it with his hands. He was saying Mamamamamamamama over and over two months ago. He did that for a few weeks, and now he won't do it anymore. He did the motions to the Itsy Bitsy Spider over a month ago ALL BY HIMSELF and I haven't seen him do it again since. The same thing goes for physical accomplishments. We have seen him bear weight on his legs. He knows how to do it, he just won't! We know he can use his arms much more than he does. What's up with this? Stubbornness? Laziness?
Monday, January 21, 2008
Heart Walk 2008
Please help TEAM ELIJAH! (Some of you may have received this same note in an email, sorry for the duplication but we want to spread the word!)
In honor of our precious baby boy, the three of us will be walking in this year’s Twin Cities Heart Walk as the captains of TEAM ELIJAH. The Heart Walk is a great event that helps raise money for the American Heart Association, for important heart disease research and awareness. We would like to ask you to join us on our walk or make a donation, or both. The walk will take place on Harriet Island in St. Paul at 10am on 4/26/08. For more information about it, click here or keep an eye on Eli's blog as the date gets closer.
We are looking for a handful of our family and friends to become team leaders along with us, to help us raise money for this organization. If you go to Elijah's Donation Page, you can click on My Team Page, then Join Our Team and then you can register online. Being a team leader just means that you will recruit walkers/donators from your own network of friends and family.
If you're not interested in being a team leader, but would like to contribute funds, you can easily do that as well. Go to Elijah's Donation Page and you can make a secure online credit card donation. The American Heart Association's online fundraising website has a minimum donation amount of $25. If you prefer to donate less, you can do so by sending a check directly to us, made out to the American Heart Association.
If you're not interested in being a team leader OR donating, you can just come walk with us! You can do all three things, just one or none at all (we promise we won't take it personally).
Your donation, participation and/or support is very valued. We sincerely appreciate ANY amount of support we can get, even if it's just an email saying, "GO TEAM ELIJAH!" Thank you, our dear friends and family, we hope to see you on April 26th.
Love,
Megan, Dan & Elijah
p.s. If you walk with us on the 26th, you'll get a TEAM ELIJAH t-shirt to keep!
p.p.s. Some of you recently and kindly donated to another organization, The Children's Heart Foundation, in honor of Elijah. We apologize for making donation requests so close together and will absolutely NOT be offended if you choose not to donate again. This event is just really important and we're very excited about it and want to do what we can to help out.
In honor of our precious baby boy, the three of us will be walking in this year’s Twin Cities Heart Walk as the captains of TEAM ELIJAH. The Heart Walk is a great event that helps raise money for the American Heart Association, for important heart disease research and awareness. We would like to ask you to join us on our walk or make a donation, or both. The walk will take place on Harriet Island in St. Paul at 10am on 4/26/08. For more information about it, click here or keep an eye on Eli's blog as the date gets closer.
We are looking for a handful of our family and friends to become team leaders along with us, to help us raise money for this organization. If you go to Elijah's Donation Page, you can click on My Team Page, then Join Our Team and then you can register online. Being a team leader just means that you will recruit walkers/donators from your own network of friends and family.
If you're not interested in being a team leader, but would like to contribute funds, you can easily do that as well. Go to Elijah's Donation Page and you can make a secure online credit card donation. The American Heart Association's online fundraising website has a minimum donation amount of $25. If you prefer to donate less, you can do so by sending a check directly to us, made out to the American Heart Association.
If you're not interested in being a team leader OR donating, you can just come walk with us! You can do all three things, just one or none at all (we promise we won't take it personally).
Your donation, participation and/or support is very valued. We sincerely appreciate ANY amount of support we can get, even if it's just an email saying, "GO TEAM ELIJAH!" Thank you, our dear friends and family, we hope to see you on April 26th.
Love,
Megan, Dan & Elijah
p.s. If you walk with us on the 26th, you'll get a TEAM ELIJAH t-shirt to keep!
p.p.s. Some of you recently and kindly donated to another organization, The Children's Heart Foundation, in honor of Elijah. We apologize for making donation requests so close together and will absolutely NOT be offended if you choose not to donate again. This event is just really important and we're very excited about it and want to do what we can to help out.
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Yurinator
It's hilarious that Elijah's urologist's first name is Yuri. Back in college, you know his fellow frat boys were yelling, "The YURINATOR!! WWOOoooooooHHOOo!" Actually, maybe not, because based on the way he treats us, one might think he didn't have many friends. We realized today how lucky we are that all of Elijah's other doctors have COMPASSION and BEDSIDE MANNER. It is obvious that this guy is very good at what he does. He does not falter in his knowledge at all and is obviously a confident, skilled doctor and surgeon. This is the only reason we will tolerate waiting for an hour in his waiting room only to spend 90 seconds talking to him, at which point he says to me in a very degrading manner, "We want what's BEST for your child," as if I don't want what is best for my child!
He had told us after Elijah was born to come back when he was 11 months old so that we could do his hypospadias surgery when he was 12 months old. So here we are, in his office when Eli is 11 months old, just like he asked. He asked about Elijah's upcoming heart surgery and we said we don't have a definite timeline but that we're guessing it will take place June-ish. He said, in a very you-should-have-known-this tone that in order to get his hypospadias repaired, we first had to get clearance from cardiology. Uh, ok...sure, we can do that, but why did we drive all the way to downtown Minneapolis just to hear that? This is when he said, "We want what is BEST for your child. Why would we do surgery now if cardiology doesn't clear him for it?" Angry Mommy responds with, "That's why we're here! We do want what's best for him. We're here because you told us to come back at this time." And he exited the room like a lightning bolt.
So now we'll call cardiology and figure out whether his hypospadias can be fixed now or if it will have to wait until next fall.
If only ALL DOCTORS treated their patients like our dear Dr. Gremmels does. We love Dr. Gremmels! And Dr. Snook! And Dr. Moga!
I have to share one funny thing from our appointment today. As we sat for ONE WHOLE HOUR in the cramped waiting room, we were able to entertain the other people sharing the waiting room with us. Elijah was soooo loud, jabbering and grunting non-stop. There were a few other babies just staring at him like, WHY ARE YOU TALKING SO MUCH, YOU CHUBBY, CURLY-HAIRED BABY? It was really funny. Other parents kept chuckling and saying to us, "He likes to talk!" It seemed like he really enjoyed having an audience. If someone got up to leave the room, he would look at them as if to say, WHERE ARE YOU GOING?!? I'M ALMOST TO THE FUNNY PART!
I know I've probably worn out my welcome for prayer requests, but we need more prayers for Baby Isaac, who is having an unexpected heart surgery tomorrow. Poor little guy, he and his family have been through so much. There has been so much going on this week with my heart babies! :( It has been a really sad week. Thanks for praying for and following the angels Madeline and Kate. They are in Heaven now and watching over all of us!
He had told us after Elijah was born to come back when he was 11 months old so that we could do his hypospadias surgery when he was 12 months old. So here we are, in his office when Eli is 11 months old, just like he asked. He asked about Elijah's upcoming heart surgery and we said we don't have a definite timeline but that we're guessing it will take place June-ish. He said, in a very you-should-have-known-this tone that in order to get his hypospadias repaired, we first had to get clearance from cardiology. Uh, ok...sure, we can do that, but why did we drive all the way to downtown Minneapolis just to hear that? This is when he said, "We want what is BEST for your child. Why would we do surgery now if cardiology doesn't clear him for it?" Angry Mommy responds with, "That's why we're here! We do want what's best for him. We're here because you told us to come back at this time." And he exited the room like a lightning bolt.
So now we'll call cardiology and figure out whether his hypospadias can be fixed now or if it will have to wait until next fall.
If only ALL DOCTORS treated their patients like our dear Dr. Gremmels does. We love Dr. Gremmels! And Dr. Snook! And Dr. Moga!
I have to share one funny thing from our appointment today. As we sat for ONE WHOLE HOUR in the cramped waiting room, we were able to entertain the other people sharing the waiting room with us. Elijah was soooo loud, jabbering and grunting non-stop. There were a few other babies just staring at him like, WHY ARE YOU TALKING SO MUCH, YOU CHUBBY, CURLY-HAIRED BABY? It was really funny. Other parents kept chuckling and saying to us, "He likes to talk!" It seemed like he really enjoyed having an audience. If someone got up to leave the room, he would look at them as if to say, WHERE ARE YOU GOING?!? I'M ALMOST TO THE FUNNY PART!
I know I've probably worn out my welcome for prayer requests, but we need more prayers for Baby Isaac, who is having an unexpected heart surgery tomorrow. Poor little guy, he and his family have been through so much. There has been so much going on this week with my heart babies! :( It has been a really sad week. Thanks for praying for and following the angels Madeline and Kate. They are in Heaven now and watching over all of us!
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
My heart is broken
I know I asked you all for prayers for Kate and Madeline the other day but I am asking again. I am crying as I write this. I cannot imagine what their parents must be going through. If you're comfortable, leave them notes of support. I know how much this means to us when we're in the middle of a crisis (not that we've ever been near this level of crisis).
Update: Little Kate passed away this morning in her mama's arms. :( I am so very sad for her parents. My heart won't stop aching. Please keep them in your prayers.
Another update: Madeline passed away yesterday (Wednesday) as well. What a sad week. Please pray for peace for her parents. Thank you.
Update: Little Kate passed away this morning in her mama's arms. :( I am so very sad for her parents. My heart won't stop aching. Please keep them in your prayers.
Another update: Madeline passed away yesterday (Wednesday) as well. What a sad week. Please pray for peace for her parents. Thank you.
Monday, January 14, 2008
Elijah + avocados
Messy cottage cheese-avocado feast with absent left sock
We think Elijah might be involved in a gang called the Left Foot Mafia. Every time we put socks on him (which is often here in FRIGID Minnesota) he removes only the left one and then continues about his play. Perhaps his left foot is always a bit too warm? I don't know, but it's pretty funny. The right sock always stays on.
Eli has a urology appointment this Thursday. We've had such a nice reprieve from doctor's visits, so it makes me sad that we're headed back into doctor and hospital territory. Next month hypospadias surgery will happen (see Elijah's Story tab if you want more info about this) and also a cardiology check and a 12-month well visit. Last week I was positive that his lips looked more blue so Dan brought him in to get his oxygen sats checked. Amazingly, they were exactly what they were a few months ago (80-84%) so we were very happy to hear this.
Our chubby boy is getting so smart! You can just see that he understands a whole lot more than ever. He now knows how to knock over his tower of blocks when I ask him to and when I get to that part in the Itsy Bitsy Spider when I tickle his neck, he anticipates it with giggling winces. I can't spend enough time with this person. I can't get enough! I wish I could just put him in my pocket and take him everywhere with me.
I'll try to post a lot of fun, cute, positive things before we are headed back into the land of doctors. Here are some fun pics to start off....
Cottage cheese face
THIS is a fat knee
Do you think Daddy dressed Elijah (this tummy moment is very rare, by the way)??
Splashy bath man. WOW does he like to splash.
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Calendar and a collection of events and information
Diagnoses
- Tetralogy of Fallot, Pulmonary Atresia, MAPCAs (repaired Apr 15, 2008; expect valve replacement in early 2011?)
- Solitary left kidney (no reflux)
- Hypospadias (repaired Aug 20, 2008)
- Tethered spinal cord (diagnosed May 11, 2009/repaired June 18, 2009)
Hospitalizations*/surgeries
Feb 20, 2007 – Hospitalized following birth due to feeding issues and heart monitoring (ventilated for 3 days/hospitalized for 2.5 weeks)
Feb 20, 2007 – Heart catheterization (already ventilated due to birth complications)
May 2, 2007 – Heart catheterization (not ventilated/no overnight stay)
May 25, 2007 – Open heart surgery to place shunt and repair collaterals (ventilated for 6 days/hospitalized for 10 days)
Jul 27, 2007 – Bronchoscopy (ventilated for less than 1 hour/no overnight stay)
Oct 29, 2007 – Heart catheterization (ventilated for 5 hours/no overnight stay)
Mar 19, 2008 – Heart catheterization (ventilated for 3 hours/no overnight stay)
Apr 15, 2008 – Open heart surgery to replace shunt with bovine valve, repair collaterals and place stent in pulmonary artery (ventilated for 3 days/hospitalized for 8 days)
Aug 20, 2008 – Hypospadias repair (ventilated for 3 hours/no overnight stay)
Nov 26, 2008 – Heart catheterization (ventilated for 5 hours/hospitalized for 1 day)
May 11, 2009 – MRI scan of brain/spine (ventilated for 2 hours/no overnight stay)
June 18, 2009 - Neurosurgery to release tethered spinal cord (ventilated for 2 hours/hospitalized for 5 days)
Nov 9, 2009 – Heart catheterization (ventilated for 3 hours/no overnight stay)
Feb 17, 2011 – Heart catheterization (ventilated for 4 hours/no overnight stay)
May 2, 2011 – Bronchoscopy/laryngoscopy (ventilated for 1 hour/no overnight stay)
Jun 10, 2011 – Open heart surgery to replace bovine valve with larger human valve and patch right pulmonary artery (ventilated for 10 hours/ hospitalized for 5 days)
* Also has had a handful of hospitalizations related to croup (no ventilation) and heart failure (no ventilation).
- Tetralogy of Fallot, Pulmonary Atresia, MAPCAs (repaired Apr 15, 2008; expect valve replacement in early 2011?)
- Solitary left kidney (no reflux)
- Hypospadias (repaired Aug 20, 2008)
- Tethered spinal cord (diagnosed May 11, 2009/repaired June 18, 2009)
Hospitalizations*/surgeries
Feb 20, 2007 – Hospitalized following birth due to feeding issues and heart monitoring (ventilated for 3 days/hospitalized for 2.5 weeks)
Feb 20, 2007 – Heart catheterization (already ventilated due to birth complications)
May 2, 2007 – Heart catheterization (not ventilated/no overnight stay)
May 25, 2007 – Open heart surgery to place shunt and repair collaterals (ventilated for 6 days/hospitalized for 10 days)
Jul 27, 2007 – Bronchoscopy (ventilated for less than 1 hour/no overnight stay)
Oct 29, 2007 – Heart catheterization (ventilated for 5 hours/no overnight stay)
Mar 19, 2008 – Heart catheterization (ventilated for 3 hours/no overnight stay)
Apr 15, 2008 – Open heart surgery to replace shunt with bovine valve, repair collaterals and place stent in pulmonary artery (ventilated for 3 days/hospitalized for 8 days)
Aug 20, 2008 – Hypospadias repair (ventilated for 3 hours/no overnight stay)
Nov 26, 2008 – Heart catheterization (ventilated for 5 hours/hospitalized for 1 day)
May 11, 2009 – MRI scan of brain/spine (ventilated for 2 hours/no overnight stay)
June 18, 2009 - Neurosurgery to release tethered spinal cord (ventilated for 2 hours/hospitalized for 5 days)
Nov 9, 2009 – Heart catheterization (ventilated for 3 hours/no overnight stay)
Feb 17, 2011 – Heart catheterization (ventilated for 4 hours/no overnight stay)
May 2, 2011 – Bronchoscopy/laryngoscopy (ventilated for 1 hour/no overnight stay)
Jun 10, 2011 – Open heart surgery to replace bovine valve with larger human valve and patch right pulmonary artery (ventilated for 10 hours/ hospitalized for 5 days)
* Also has had a handful of hospitalizations related to croup (no ventilation) and heart failure (no ventilation).
Friday, January 11, 2008
My chunky boy
Dan went up north with some friends this weekend, so Elijah and I get to bond here at home. It's so much fun for me to spend quality time with him. During the week when I'm working from 7-4 and only get to see the chunky monkey for two hours every night, I do get a little upset. I often find myself thinking, WHY?!? Why is it fair that I only get two hours a night with my baby? But then I remind myself that I have AMAZING insurance and AMAZING benefits and, for Elijah's sake, it could not be any other way. Dan stays home with Eli two days every week and that is perfect for our situation. It couldn't be more ideal, actually. I really have nothing to complain about.
Our chubby little man has gotten SO MUCH CHUBBIER in the past couple weeks. This week he weighed in at 21.5 lbs. He has crossed over the line between being tolerably chubby and being difficult-to-handle chubby. I'm having a very hard time maneuvering and lugging this big boy around. My back hurts a lot of the time and I'm unable to cart him around the house the way I did a month ago. It's good that he's gaining weight. It's very good! But it's taking a toll on me (that's not a complaint, his weight gain is nothing but a blessing. I'll take the brunt any day.).
Lately Elijah has been letting out really deep growls. It is so funny. He has always been a growler, but now it's a few octaves lower, like he has become a bass growler instead of a tenor growler. Hopefully we can get it on video in the next couple days to share with you.
He has also been very clingy lately. We are working on the stranger anxiety issue and on getting him to be comfortable around other people. He loves Daddy more than anything, second place is Mommy, and everyone else is chopped liver. We're trying really hard not to "rescue" him when he's in an uncomfortable situation because we want him to get accustomed to being around others. This is our current "project," next to the tummy time that we're always trying to get him used to. I can't believe that at almost eleven months old, he STILL won't tolerate tummy time.
He has been eating SO WELL lately. Not that he has ever not eaten well, but he is eating extra good these days. I guess that explains my sore arms and shoulders, huh? We've recently introduced him to some new, chunkier foods, which he's really taken to. He now loves cottage cheese and avocados and bananas and cookies and crackers. Just a few weeks ago he was gagging uncontrollably on all of those things so it's good to see progress in the food swallowing.
I could go on and on about the cuteness that surrounds this special little person, but I'll save some for next time. I'll take some good pictures this weekend and share them. Thanks, as always, for checking in on us. It really means so much. Please don't forget to pray for the babies I mentioned in my last post. They REALLY NEED PRAYERS. Thank you, it means a lot.
Our chubby little man has gotten SO MUCH CHUBBIER in the past couple weeks. This week he weighed in at 21.5 lbs. He has crossed over the line between being tolerably chubby and being difficult-to-handle chubby. I'm having a very hard time maneuvering and lugging this big boy around. My back hurts a lot of the time and I'm unable to cart him around the house the way I did a month ago. It's good that he's gaining weight. It's very good! But it's taking a toll on me (that's not a complaint, his weight gain is nothing but a blessing. I'll take the brunt any day.).
Lately Elijah has been letting out really deep growls. It is so funny. He has always been a growler, but now it's a few octaves lower, like he has become a bass growler instead of a tenor growler. Hopefully we can get it on video in the next couple days to share with you.
He has also been very clingy lately. We are working on the stranger anxiety issue and on getting him to be comfortable around other people. He loves Daddy more than anything, second place is Mommy, and everyone else is chopped liver. We're trying really hard not to "rescue" him when he's in an uncomfortable situation because we want him to get accustomed to being around others. This is our current "project," next to the tummy time that we're always trying to get him used to. I can't believe that at almost eleven months old, he STILL won't tolerate tummy time.
He has been eating SO WELL lately. Not that he has ever not eaten well, but he is eating extra good these days. I guess that explains my sore arms and shoulders, huh? We've recently introduced him to some new, chunkier foods, which he's really taken to. He now loves cottage cheese and avocados and bananas and cookies and crackers. Just a few weeks ago he was gagging uncontrollably on all of those things so it's good to see progress in the food swallowing.
I could go on and on about the cuteness that surrounds this special little person, but I'll save some for next time. I'll take some good pictures this weekend and share them. Thanks, as always, for checking in on us. It really means so much. Please don't forget to pray for the babies I mentioned in my last post. They REALLY NEED PRAYERS. Thank you, it means a lot.
Prayer
I know for a fact that the reason Elijah has done so well through all of his medical junk and his surgeries is because he has had about a thousand people praying for him. He received huge amounts of prayer even when he was the size of a peanut in my belly. One of the things I have learned so far in this journey is that PRAYER WORKS. Sooo....
We seem to know a lot of people right now who are in serious need of serious prayer. I'd like to ask all of you to help out by sending up a few prayers for Madeline, who has been through more than everyone in the states of Minnesota, Iowa and Wisconsin combined. She needs a new heart, but just recently got bumped off the transplant list because the rest of her problems are becoming quite serious. She's in a critical state right now. She's back on the evil ECMO machine for the third time in five months. Her dad wrote on her website this morning, "Few expected Madeline to make it through the night, but she did."
Another cute baby who I check in on regularly, Baby Isaac, has to go in for an unexpected open heart surgery next week. I cannot imagine having a week to emotionally prepare for an OHS, so please say some prayers for Isaac AND his sweet family.
And then there's Baby Kate, who has spent 120 out of the last 168 days in the hospital. The doctors don't know exactly what to think because her health has been like a rollercoaster since her last OHS.
All of these babies have parents who are AMAZING and who have gone through A WHOLE LOT, like, more than I can ever fathom. Please pray for them and tell your friends to pray for them, too. THANK YOU.
We seem to know a lot of people right now who are in serious need of serious prayer. I'd like to ask all of you to help out by sending up a few prayers for Madeline, who has been through more than everyone in the states of Minnesota, Iowa and Wisconsin combined. She needs a new heart, but just recently got bumped off the transplant list because the rest of her problems are becoming quite serious. She's in a critical state right now. She's back on the evil ECMO machine for the third time in five months. Her dad wrote on her website this morning, "Few expected Madeline to make it through the night, but she did."
Another cute baby who I check in on regularly, Baby Isaac, has to go in for an unexpected open heart surgery next week. I cannot imagine having a week to emotionally prepare for an OHS, so please say some prayers for Isaac AND his sweet family.
And then there's Baby Kate, who has spent 120 out of the last 168 days in the hospital. The doctors don't know exactly what to think because her health has been like a rollercoaster since her last OHS.
All of these babies have parents who are AMAZING and who have gone through A WHOLE LOT, like, more than I can ever fathom. Please pray for them and tell your friends to pray for them, too. THANK YOU.
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
My moment
Do you ever have those moments when the world stops around you and everything seems perfectly aligned and peaceful? Then you try to store everything you are smelling, feeling, seeing and touching away in your mind so that you can come back to that moment later? I've had a few of them in my life, and I often take myself back to those moments for peace when I need it. They are pretty rare (at least for me) and I think that's what makes them so special and memorable. I experienced one of these rare moments this week during our flight back to Minneapolis.
We were in the airplane, the plane was dark and quiet, Dan had his eyes closed in the seat next to me and Elijah was sprawled out in my lap, contentedly playing with a plastic cup, turning it over and over in his hands, examining it from every angle and chewing on it with his new teeth. I reached down and ran the backs of my fingers along his velvety soft, chubby neck, as I often do, and then I leaned over and kissed him in the same spot and smelled his perfect, sweet baby scent. I ran my fingers through his curls and hugged him tightly in my arms as he babbled to the plastic cup.
It was the perfect moment. With my husband resting in the seat next to me, my baby, this sweet and amazing little person, was sitting in my lap, content and relaxed, allowing me to touch and smell and snuggle him as much as I wanted. For as long as I live, I will know the smell and softness of his skin and the sweet sound of his voice and the peaceful feeling I had inside of me as if it were that exact moment. It will stay with me forever.
Too often I find myself getting caught up in wanting the next stage to get here. I am constantly wishing for Elijah to be able to crawl, walk and talk. By doing that, I'm wishing away this precious stage he is in right now. During my moment on the plane, I genuinely appreciated Elijah for who he was at that exact second in time. I think it's somewhat natural to look forward to the next step and to be curious about what is to come, but it felt so nice to truly live in the moment and to be sincerely enjoying exactly what that moment was worth.
Elijah, if you read this some day, I hope you are still letting me snuggle and hug you. If not, please know how much it means that I will at least always have the memory of it. I love you!
We were in the airplane, the plane was dark and quiet, Dan had his eyes closed in the seat next to me and Elijah was sprawled out in my lap, contentedly playing with a plastic cup, turning it over and over in his hands, examining it from every angle and chewing on it with his new teeth. I reached down and ran the backs of my fingers along his velvety soft, chubby neck, as I often do, and then I leaned over and kissed him in the same spot and smelled his perfect, sweet baby scent. I ran my fingers through his curls and hugged him tightly in my arms as he babbled to the plastic cup.
It was the perfect moment. With my husband resting in the seat next to me, my baby, this sweet and amazing little person, was sitting in my lap, content and relaxed, allowing me to touch and smell and snuggle him as much as I wanted. For as long as I live, I will know the smell and softness of his skin and the sweet sound of his voice and the peaceful feeling I had inside of me as if it were that exact moment. It will stay with me forever.
Too often I find myself getting caught up in wanting the next stage to get here. I am constantly wishing for Elijah to be able to crawl, walk and talk. By doing that, I'm wishing away this precious stage he is in right now. During my moment on the plane, I genuinely appreciated Elijah for who he was at that exact second in time. I think it's somewhat natural to look forward to the next step and to be curious about what is to come, but it felt so nice to truly live in the moment and to be sincerely enjoying exactly what that moment was worth.
Elijah, if you read this some day, I hope you are still letting me snuggle and hug you. If not, please know how much it means that I will at least always have the memory of it. I love you!
Friday, January 4, 2008
He might look a bit like me after all??
My dad, stepmom and brother put these photos into a picture frame for me for Christmas...
p.s. I've been meaning to say THANK YOU to all of you who donated money to the Children's Heart Foundation. Thank you thank you thank you. This means so much to us. More than $600 was raised in honor of Elijah!
p.s. I've been meaning to say THANK YOU to all of you who donated money to the Children's Heart Foundation. Thank you thank you thank you. This means so much to us. More than $600 was raised in honor of Elijah!
Thursday, January 3, 2008
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
To: Grandma, Grandpa, Uncle Joel and Puppy Juan From: Elijah
Dear Grandma, Grandpa, Uncle Joel and Juan,
After a very long day in airports and on airplanes yesterday, WE MADE IT HOME! Not to brag or anything, but I was a very good boy despite the off-the-charts level of tiredness I had reached. I hardly cried at all. The First Officer didn't show up for our first flight (too much New Years partying, I guess) and our second flight was delayed due to bad weather. We were all zombies by the time we got home last night.
Now to the important stuff.
Grandpa: I enjoyed making funny faces and smiling at you and having you read books and watch Baby Signing Times with me. Thank you for carrying my chunky body around the house when I was fussy. Sorry if I hurt your back. I'm very lucky to have you as a grandpa and I can't wait to get hugs, kisses and snuggles from you again.
Grandma: Thank you for washing my clothes and blankets when I pooped and peed through them multiple times and for the many yummy meals that made Mommy gain seven pounds. I didn't necessarily enjoy the tummy time you helped me with, but Mommy says she is thankful for that. I loved it when you blew air into my chubby neck and made me giggle. That tickles!
Grandma AND Grandpa: Thank you for enduring the sofa bed so that we could take over your dark, quiet, comfy bedroom and thanks for the wonderful Christmas gifts.
Juan: I know you were a little jealous of the attention everyone was giving me, so thank you for allowing me to be the focus of the house for a few days and for tolerating my crying and constant babbling and grunting. I understand that you went on fewer walks and didn't get pet as much because of me, so that is why I didn't get upset when you decided that my squeaky ducky toy was indeed yours. I hope you enjoyed all the Cheerios I threw onto the floor just for you.
Joel: Thank you for reading to me and giving me hugs and for keeping my daddy entertained with your Xbox 360. Thanks for giving up precious football-watching time so I could watch my beloved Veggie Tales. Mommy says she is so happy to have you as a brother and I think you're a great uncle.
Next time we come visit, Mommy wants to see the Biltmore Mansion and maybe even get up into the mountains to ski. Next time we'll stay longer because the four days we just spent with you wasn't nearly long enough. Now we're back into the routine of work, daycare and co-o-o-old weather. We miss and love you all very much!
I'm tired, I better go take a nap.
Love,
Elijah
p.s. Mom will post pictures later. She took a lot.
p.p.s. On New Years Eve, I heard you guys laughing all night long while I was in bed. It sounded like you were having a good time. What were you doing? I think I heard something about Sasquatch, baby seals and a train pipe?
After a very long day in airports and on airplanes yesterday, WE MADE IT HOME! Not to brag or anything, but I was a very good boy despite the off-the-charts level of tiredness I had reached. I hardly cried at all. The First Officer didn't show up for our first flight (too much New Years partying, I guess) and our second flight was delayed due to bad weather. We were all zombies by the time we got home last night.
Now to the important stuff.
Grandpa: I enjoyed making funny faces and smiling at you and having you read books and watch Baby Signing Times with me. Thank you for carrying my chunky body around the house when I was fussy. Sorry if I hurt your back. I'm very lucky to have you as a grandpa and I can't wait to get hugs, kisses and snuggles from you again.
Grandma: Thank you for washing my clothes and blankets when I pooped and peed through them multiple times and for the many yummy meals that made Mommy gain seven pounds. I didn't necessarily enjoy the tummy time you helped me with, but Mommy says she is thankful for that. I loved it when you blew air into my chubby neck and made me giggle. That tickles!
Grandma AND Grandpa: Thank you for enduring the sofa bed so that we could take over your dark, quiet, comfy bedroom and thanks for the wonderful Christmas gifts.
Juan: I know you were a little jealous of the attention everyone was giving me, so thank you for allowing me to be the focus of the house for a few days and for tolerating my crying and constant babbling and grunting. I understand that you went on fewer walks and didn't get pet as much because of me, so that is why I didn't get upset when you decided that my squeaky ducky toy was indeed yours. I hope you enjoyed all the Cheerios I threw onto the floor just for you.
Joel: Thank you for reading to me and giving me hugs and for keeping my daddy entertained with your Xbox 360. Thanks for giving up precious football-watching time so I could watch my beloved Veggie Tales. Mommy says she is so happy to have you as a brother and I think you're a great uncle.
Next time we come visit, Mommy wants to see the Biltmore Mansion and maybe even get up into the mountains to ski. Next time we'll stay longer because the four days we just spent with you wasn't nearly long enough. Now we're back into the routine of work, daycare and co-o-o-old weather. We miss and love you all very much!
I'm tired, I better go take a nap.
Love,
Elijah
p.s. Mom will post pictures later. She took a lot.
p.p.s. On New Years Eve, I heard you guys laughing all night long while I was in bed. It sounded like you were having a good time. What were you doing? I think I heard something about Sasquatch, baby seals and a train pipe?
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