Wednesday, January 7, 2015

Rock bottom

Today was rough, to put it so very kindly. It was one of the most difficult days I have ever experienced with our oldest boy. School was canceled due to the cold temps, but I don't know that we would have sent him anyhow. I want to erase every moment of the day from my memory. A LOT of screaming, crying, thrashing, hitting and kicking occurred. I was a contributor to the screaming and crying portions. It was an ugly ugly day.

Elijah's brain is WAY overloaded. After a semester of school, Christmas-related commotion, croup x2 and a cough that disturbed many nights of sleep...his NLD brain is SPENT. He is in a really bad place and basically has zero control over anything he says or does. I am kind of in the same spot and it is hard to be nice or control my emotions right now, so I understand.

We cannot expect Elijah to go on like this. None of us can go on like this. Dan and I have decided to keep him out of school until he is 100% caught up, even if it takes four weeks. We are hoping to get a doctor to back us and possibly do homebound schooling in the meantime. If that isn't possible...gulp...we are going to take him out of school entirely. This would CRUSH Elijah and I really hope it doesn't have to come to that.

I am so sad that the world is so overwhelming for him. I cannot imagine how he must feel right now. I feel so terribly for him, but at the same time it is really draining to endure what he has to offer when he's on overload. PLEASE pray for him! Pray for all of us. We are at the bottom of a very deep pit and we're all feeling helpless.

1 comment:

Amy Croghan said...

So sorry to hear you guys have hit bottom. Logan has short bursts of overload, so I can only imagine what it is like for that to be multiplied. I hope Elijah is able to get back on track, since he enjoys school. If not, hopefully you will be approved for homebound instruction. Don't blame yourself for losing your patience. Just remember tomorrow is a new day. We will pray for peace, rest, and happiness for all of you.