The End of an Era!

Today marks the end of an era! The boys walked out of their amazing school for the last time. Elijah has attended this school for five years and Sammy for two. The teachers and staff at this school have POURED love, energy, time, encouragement and teaching into our boys. The Porta boys are well-known at school and leaving all of those wonderful people has made for an emotional day. Sammy and I are having the hardest time of all, no surprise there. Tonight at bedtime Sammy cried sweet little tears. He's going to miss his classmates, especially since they have all been together for two consecutive years. It's a good lesson to learn, but it kills me to see him so sad. Elijah on the other hand is much more excited about new adventures and seems much less sad.

Mother's Day was amazing this year! My boys spoiled me rotten. Dan's and my 11th anniversary was the day before, so we got out for dinner to celebrate. It's been a month filled with tons of good, fun things, including field trips and track and field days and time in our backyard.

Earlier this week Elijah had a check-up with ENT. The hearing in his left ear is declining in higher decibels. My heart sank when I saw the change from the last test six months ago, but Dr. L assured me that there's nothing to worry about yet. He peeked in his ear and saw that the prosthesis is rubbing up against the eardrum a bit, probably causing the decline in hearing. We'll have him checked again in six months and go from there! My mind has wandered to sad places this week, but I keep reminding myself that Elijah's amazing story isn't going to change the more I worry. His story is his story and it will play out JUST as the script is written.

About a week ago we ended a week-long streak of verrrrrry challenging behavior with E. I saw things that I hadn't seen in years. He has been affected by seasonal allergies off and on again this spring and at its worst, it has severely affected sleep. And we all know what happens when his sleep is affected. Thankfully things seem to be getting better and behavior has normalized. Aside from his CONSTANT fighting with his brother, that is.

We have a TON of exciting summer plans to look forward to! Dan is guiding a DC tour this weekend and on Monday the boys and I will fly out to meet him. We will explore DC as a family for a few days and then we (minus Dan) will head to North Carolina to visit my dad and stepmom for a few days. So many more fun things are in store and we can't wait for the summer to unfold and for the end-of-era sadness to fade.

Thanks for checking in! Have a great holiday weekend!

Warmly hugging challenges

I have sat down a few times in the past few days to write a post, but it just hasn't felt right. Anything that is going on in our lives, good or otherwise, seems so insignificant when I think of my friend whose heart is aching because she wants to hold her son again. One thing Isaac's passing has taught me is that there are so many things I obsess about that either really don't matter or that cannot be changed. Worrying about the things that aren't going MY way is pointless! I have made an effort in the past week to truly appreciate every day and moment, even if it is challenging. I envision myself wrapping my arms around whatever challenge I am facing and smiling at it and even thanking it.

It still feels wrong to talk about anything that is going on in our lives. It's too soon. We are good. We have each other, we are all healthy, we have a warm home, comfy beds and food in the pantry. I really couldn't ask for more than that.

More later!

A great loss.

I have been crying for most of the day because I cannot wrap my head around the fact that our sweet little heart friend Isaac has suddenly entered Heaven's gates. I met Isaac's mom Kathy way back when I first started this blog. We made an immediate connection and have even traveled across the country a handful of times to see each other. Isaac was born just a month after Elijah and had the same heart defect Elijah has. The last time we saw Isaac was in July 2013 when we went on our whirlwind road trip. We spent four cherished days with the Rollers in Dallas at another wonderful heart family's home. I will cherish those memories forever. None of us had any idea that it would be the last time we would see our snuggly, sweet little Isaac. He was such a lovable boy. I have been in disbelief all day. I can't believe he is gone.

He had a high fever over the weekend, so his parents brought him to the hospital. An infection had gone into his heart. :( They put him on a ventilator and told his family that he wouldn't make it through the night. He passed away a few hours later.

Isaac is the snuggly cutie on the right..

Please pray with us for peace and healing for Isaac's family. They are the absolute sweetest, kindest people on the planet and I want to completely cover them in prayer. I have also set up a campaign for them so they will not have to worry about money during this difficult time. If it is on your heart, please visit the following link and consider making a donation.

https://mymfunding.com/campaign/TheRollerFamily

Life is so fragile and precious. Make the most of every single day. You just never know..

First grade sadness

As I do every evening, I asked Elijah what his favorite part of the day was. He said he didn't know, so I asked about lunch (his previously stated favorite part of the day). A sad look came over his face and he grew silent. I carefully inquired and he shared with me that the other kids in his class don't like to sit with him, so he sits "alone" during lunch. Dan and I agreed that this was a top 3 biggest punch-in-gut moment, six years of hospital and medical drama included.

Granted, I feel like I should speak with his teacher before getting too upset but gauging from the sad look on his little face I'm assuming there is some speck of truth here. Our sweet, kind, strong, friendly, AMAZING child is feeling excluded and is hurting.

He has been having behavioral problems in school, as well, which truly doesn't surprise me much. It was a rough summer in that department. We are working with his teacher to take care of specific behaviors and hopefully put them to rest.

Please pray for our sweet boy. Pray that he will have confidence about awesome he truly is and how LOVED he is. Also pray for the teachers at his school to know how to care for him the best. Thank you!

On a much lighter note, I'll end with a little bit of shameless bragging! :) I was published in a magazine! Go grab the October issue of Southern Living magazine off the shelf and check out page 12!

Balancing silliness and sadness

Our friend Neal was called to heaven yesterday. I'm so sad I'll never see him again in this life, but I'm so happy he is in a better place. The BEST place! We love you, Neal!! Thank you for being such a genuine, kind friend to us!

A couple Elijah funnies from last night:

If Dan isn't home when I'm putting Sammy to bed, I have a pretty hard time keeping Elijah out of the room while I'm getting him down. Last night I had a gentle talk with him: "Elijah, I will be back out in two minutes. Please play in your bedroom while I put Sam to bed so he can get to sleep." "Ok, Mom." Just as I was kissing a sleepy Sam good night, Elijah opened the door and in a (very) loud whisper said, "Mom! Mine underpants is wet!" I couldn't even get mad. It was too cute.

Then later, he was crying over something or another, most likely about being asked to go sit on the potty chair. A few minutes after he was done crying, he said, "Wook, Mom! I have cry on my shirt!" At first I didn't know what he was talking about, but realized he meant his tears had dripped onto his shirt.