Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Answered prayers

A little brotherly love..

Last night was probably our most difficult night so far. Sam has become a grazer, so some of his feedings get really drawn out and slow (you know he got this from YOU, Gramps!). We were up with him a few times last night for long stretches, so we are a tired bunch today.

I have been worrying about and dreading this weekend like crazy. I have no idea how everything is going to get done with only me here with the two little ones. I checked my email this morning and a very sweet friend has offered to come over on Saturday and bring dinner and also spend some time with Elijah so I can get some time with Samson, etc. I couldn't have gotten a more perfect offer, so I am feeling better about everything. Thank you, Debra!! We can't wait to see you!

Then I got a call from my very sweet lactation consultant. She was checking in to see how things were going. I was honest with her. I told her I just wasn't sure I was going to be able to pump, attempt nursing AND be a good mom to both of my boys AND take showers regularly. She was so incredibly supportive of whatever decision I make and that really meant a lot to me. I have some big decisions to make in the near future and the thing I worry about most is finding peace with those decisions. Mama Guilt is a strong strong emotion!! I don't want to be held captive by it, and that is my main prayer these days.

Elijah just got home from playing with his friends, so I must go love on him!!


Cecilia said...

Elijah is cute and adorable as always! Just love those pictures of your two little men!

jencooper said...

I love the pics of the boys together!! Bennett used to love giving Gracie her paci. So cute!

I am so happy that you got help for this weekend. That will help you tremendously!!

Sam, behave for you mama!!

Hang in there...don't feel guilty. Take care of yourself so you can take care of your boys.

Anonymous said...

Hi! I am so pro-breastfeeding that it isn't funny... BUT I think if you give it your all (and it sounds like you gave 120%) and it doesn't work out, well then it doesn't work out. Your son will grow up happy and healthy not because he was breastfed, but because his mama loves him. Give yourself a pat on the back and do what feels right...

Kathy said...

I wish I could have given you boobie advice..
but, I didn't nurse Chris, Eli was a breeze, and Isaac wasn't even able to nurse.
I think that you tried..
and you have a SUPER cute, healthy baby...
if he gets formula...he's ok. He's so perfect...pump what you can...when it's gone, it's gone. Don't feel bad about whatever decision you decide.
You're too busy to worry about that...
you've got two handsome guys to play with...
Kiss those boys for me..
and Elijah looks like such the perfect little helper.
(does he talk to Sam all day instead of you guys? or is it double time talking to everyone?)

Tina:0) said...

What adorable little men you have! Looks like Mr. Elijah is being a super big brother:0)

Praying that the feeding issues you're experiencing resolve soon! I attempted to nurse Gabie, but it just didn't work. Then I found out that the meds I was on for high blood pressure decreased milk production... go figure! Sending big hugs your way!